Newton's a goner
by bellapouts
Summary: Sequel to Evil Little Prankster. The Cullen's are out to get Mike Newton's big brother Nick who wants to claim Bella for himself. He teams up with Jacob and Jessica to bring down the Cullen's. And so begins an all out prank war...
1. Chapter 1

**This is the sequel to my other story Evil Little Prankster. It's the next day after the day that was in the last chapter… You might not understand this story or who Nick Newton is unless you read that story first, so… yeah. I'm trying to make this funny so work with me here people! Rate and review, please. Inform of what you think about this sequel!**

**BPOV**

Nick Newton really had it in for the Cullen's now. I mean, after everything we put him through… well, it was pretty funny anyway. I really hate people staring at me and he did do a lot of it. So yesterday when he came over and blasted Edward, we couldn't help but try to think of another way to prank him. We'd been thinking about it a lot, but so far we hadn't really come up with anything… good.

Emmett walked into the room and sighed. We had assigned him the job of spying on Nick Newton all day, trying to figure out how we could prank him.

"Nothing," he told us, "absolutely NOTHING."

Nothing? Nothing at all? A whole day of spying and… nothing?

"Nothing?" I repeated.

"The kid isn't very interesting, apart from… a few things," explained Emmett, his face turning into a grin.

"Well?" asked Rosalie.

"He did a really stinky poo today, and it stank. Didn't even flush the button…" started Emmett.

"Ha!" shrieked Rosalie, "You can talk!"

"…Or wash his hands…"

"What and you do?" interrupted Jasper.

"…and Mr. Newton works in the police force…" continued Emmett.

"With Charlie?" shrieked Bella.

"Look! Can you guys stop interrupting me? And Jasper and Rosalie, I don't use the toilet. So why would I need to flush the button or wash my hands?" shrieked Emmett.

"You don't use the toilet, but you stick animal… droppings in there, trying to be funny. You don't flush or wash your hands, even after handling the animal droppings!" laughed Alice.

"Keep going," encouraged Edward.

"Okay, so apart from that stinky poo, Mr. Newton works in the police force with Bella's father Charlie. So Charlie and Mr. Newton are obviously… pretty good friends. Am I right? Well… that could be bad," explained Emmett.

Of course it was bad! Nick and Mike's dad worked with Charlie! My father! My father! This was bad, very bad indeed. I hoped Nick hadn't told his father about our… uh… date.

"For once I agree with Emmett," I groaned, "This is bad, this is very bad."

"Indeed," agreed Rosalie.

--

That afternoon Edward drove me back home in the Volvo.

"Make sure Emmett gets some dirt on Nick Newton tomorrow. I don't want to have to discuss poos again all day tomorrow," I ordered. He merely chuckled and got out of the car and ran around to open my door.

I stepped out just as it began to rain.

"Great…" I muttered.

"I'll be back before you blink," he promised. I laughed and kissed him goodbye, before turning and running into the house.

When I walked into the living room, Charlie gasped.

"Bella! You're soaking! You'd better go change. I invited Sally-Anne and Rodney over; he's bringing his boys for tea and she's bringing her son," said Charlie, "We'll be watching the game too."

I frowned.

"Is Rodney the one with the three-year-old twins? I'm not having them in this house ever again, dad, not after last time. I'll go over to the Cullen's if they are! They tied me down and covered me in lipstick and eye shadow and…" I started. Charlie laughed.

"No, I work with Rodney. Rodney Newton? You know him, and I know you know the two Newton boys," explained Charlie.

Gulp. Rodney _Newton_? The two '_Newton boys'?_ Crap. Crap. Crap.

"When will they be here?" I asked, trying to act happy.

"Half an hour. Why?"

"No reason, dad. I'll go upstairs and… change," I lied.

I ran upstairs and grabbed my phone. I dialled Alice's number. I would only do a thing like this if I were absolutely desperate.

"Alice? Alice? I need your help!"

--

I walked down the stairs in my skinny jeans and a top, just as there was a knock on the door. Alice! Yes!

"I'll get it, dad!" I told him as I raced past to open the door. I opened the door, grinning.

"Hi A… oh, um… hello."

Rodney Newton, Nick and Mike were standing in the doorway.

"Hello, you must be Isabella," greeted Mr. Newton.

"Bella," I corrected, "And you must be Mr. Newton."

"Rodney," he corrected. I put on a fake smile.

"Hi Bella!" grinned Nick, waving. Great…

"Hey Bella!" greeted Mike, waving. Great…

"Come in, come in," I told them, standing back for them to walk in. This was bad. The Newton's had arrived before Alice. What would I do now?

Charlie ushered them all over to our new big table.

"Bella made lasagne, she's a great cook," informed Charlie, just as there was a knock on the door.

"I'll get it!" I cried, running to the door. I opened it.

"Hi A… oh, um… hello."

It wasn't Alice this time, either. It was Eric Yorkie and his mother Mrs. Yorkie.

"Hello there, I'm Sally-Anne Yorkie. Your father invited us over for dinner," she told me.

Gulp. Eric _Yorkie_? What a nightmare! I ushered them over to the table with everyone else.

"I'll go and get the lasagne," I said loudly, as an excuse to leave them.

"I'll assist you, shall I?" offered Nick Newton, getting to his feet.

"UM, no, I'll be right on my own," I snapped, turning and walking over to get the lasagne. There was a knock on the door and I raced over to answer it.

"Hi Alice! What are you doing here?" I said loudly, trying to sound shocked, "Come in here where everyone is."

I led her out with the others.

"Alice? Hello!" greeted Charlie. He always liked Alice, which was good for me.

"Hello Charlie! I hope I'm not interrupting… oh, hello Nick!"

Nick scowled under his breath at her.

"Interrupting? No, not at all!" grinned Charlie.

"Well… I don't mean to be a burden, but they're having a huge sale at Port Angeles and I just can't help my shopping instincts! You know me, Charlie. Shopping is my thing," explained Alice.

"Oh… well do you think you could take some things back that we bought last time? I don't really want to go out right now. We've got visitors…" I lied.

"Oh, Bella! You really should try things on before you buy them!" said Alice, "I don't even know what sizes to get. Will you come with me?"

I turned to Charlie.

"Dad?"

"Could it wait until after dinner? I heard about that sale too, Alice. It goes till midnight. There'll be plenty of time for you guys to shop. You should join us for dinner, Alice," babbled Charlie. Alice grinned.

"That's a great idea, Charlie! But I've already eaten. Esme's a great cook, but so is Bella. I just can't decide whose better!" lied Alice. She sounded so convincing that Charlie believed every word that came out of her mouth. Such a shame that he wasn't like that with Edward…

So I had to endure dinner with the Yorkie's and the Newton's. So much for my genius plan…

When I was finished I stood up and grinned at dad.

"Dad, you know Alice," I said, indicating Alice, who was sitting on the lounge patiently waiting for me to finish, "she doesn't shop for ten minutes. She shops for… a long time. So we'd better go now."

"Oh Charlie, can Bella sleepover tonight?" asked Alice, politely. Charlie frowned.

"Where's Edward tonight?" he growled.

"Oh, he went out with Jasper," replied Alice. I knew she was lying, but what Charlie didn't know, wouldn't hurt him…

"Okay, yes, well you girls behave and I'll see you tomorrow," grinned Charlie. Edward was on the top of Charlie's hate list. It really annoyed me. I was a legal adult now, _and _I had graduated. Charlie couldn't control me for the rest of my life.

Sally-Anne stood up.

"Charlie we'll have to go too, I've got to work tomorrow morning. I'm sorry," said Sally-Anne.

Charlie grinned and walked over to her and… and…

…Kissed Sally-Anne Yorkie on the _lips_. Ugh!

Sally-Anne and Eric left while I ran upstairs and packed my bag for my 'sleepover' with Alice. I ran downstairs and kissed Charlie goodbye.

"Goodbye Bella, the food was wonderful. You can cook for me any old time," said Nick, loudly, wiggling his eyebrows up and down at me. I put on a fake smile. I knew what he was getting at. He had been giving me comments all night and telling Charlie how wonderful he was and how much of a great daughter he had raised and how lovely he thought our house was. Charlie looked over at him fondly.

Alice and I ran through the rain and hopped in the Porsche. Alice sped off into the distance.

"That was most definitely the worst night of my life!" I groaned. Alice grinned at me.

"Did you see Charlie kiss Sally-Anne _Yorkie_? YORKIE! Ugh!" I groaned.

"Nick didn't shut up, either!" I groaned.

"Yes," agreed Alice, "Babbling on about how great you were and how great Charlie was and how he had a lovely house and a beautiful daughter and… he even mentioned that he was single, once…"

"Or twice!" I cried.

"Or all night," laughed Alice, "He's trying to impress… no, suck up to Charlie! I can see it!"

"I need to get back at Nick for this! Emmett better hurry up and figure out a way for us to prank him fast or… or…" I started angrily.

"Or?" repeated Alice.

"…Or I'll deal with Newton myself."

--

**I know! I'm evil, right? But come on, every author likes a good cliff hanger! There'll be more chapters to this than ELP probably. I hope everyone likes the sequel so far, so please rate and review so I know if there's anything that needs improving and whether you like the sequel so far or not… anyway, that's all for now :)**

**Bellapouts **


	2. Chapter 2

**BPOV**

We arrived at the Cullen's house and Alice explained what had happened.

"Where's Emmett?" I asked. Rosalie grinned.

"Don't worry, Bella. I beat you to it. I sent him over to the Newton house while no one's home so he can… have a look around," she said, laughing.

"You mean to tell me that Nick Newton is at _my _house with no supervision whatsoever?" I gasped. Esme laughed.

"Don't worry about that either, Bella," she reassured me.

"Yeah, Jasper's over there. All he said was, 'Jasper is watching,' and left," explained Edward. I had to laugh at that.

"Good on him!" I cheered.

"Death to Newton!" cried Rosalie.

"Yes, kill Newton. I support the cause," I agreed.

"Kids, Carlisle and I aren't going to interfere with you're uh… plans…" began Esme.

"You mean pranks," corrected Alice.

"…But be sensible. Okay?" she finished, sternly.

"Don't worry about it, Esme. We'll be fine!" promised Edward.

The front door burst open and Emmett walked in, grinning. He was holding a brown book.

"Guys, you're never going to believe this! Nick keeps a diary!" he told us, laughing.

"A diary?" gasped Rosalie. She jumped up and kissed Emmett on the cheek.

"Emmett you're a genius!" I congratulated.

I looked over at Edward, who was frowning.

"Emmett… how is a _diary _going to help us? I mean… it's a… diary," he mused.

Emmett sighed and passed the little brown diary to me. I opened it up to the first page and laughed.

"He started writing in a diary _yesterday_?" I laughed. Emmett grinned.

"Yeah, pretty lame, huh? Read yesterday's entry out loud," he laughed.

I cleared my throat.

"_Today was the morning after Bella and I had our date. Bella is such a beautiful girl. I want her. She's so awesome. She got engaged to some idiot Edward Cullen. I hate the Cullen's now. They must DIE. I went around to their house this morning to give Bella some chocolates and flowers but Edward wouldn't even let me past him to see her and so we got into an argument. I think he's drugged Bella! She would never go for a guy like him and I could tell she totally loves me more than him. Tomorrow night my dad, Mike and I are going over to the Swan's house for tea and to watch the game. This is great! I get a chance to talk to Bella alone, to be with her, alone, without Edward… if I get her pregnant, she'll have to marry me!_" I read, shaking my head at parts.

"He is an IDIOT. 'If I get her pregnant, she'll have to marry me'?" I repeated, "I mean, as IF I would EVER sleep with that ASS."

"He's deranged if he thinks that I drugged you!" laughed Edward.

"I think we all know that Bella loves Edward a LOT more than Nick Newton," agreed Rosalie.

"What do you mean? I don't like Newton at ALL, Rosalie," I argued.

"I know, um… calm down, Bella," replied Rosalie.

I rolled my eyes at her. Nick was a total freakazoid.

"What a weirdo…" muttered Emmett.

Edward was still frowning. I looked up at him and he looked down at me with his soft topaz eyes. Edward was the closest thing to god on Earth…

"Emmett, I still don't understand how _that _will help us 'prank' Nick Newton," said Edward.

"Bella, read today's entry out loud," ordered Emmett.

"Aye, aye, Captain," I joked, opening the book to today's entry.

"_Guess what? Mike is dragging me along to Paint Ball tomorrow! We're going into the forest in La Push. He's taking me, Jessica, Eric and some kid called Jacob that he's friends with. It'll be good to get my mind off of the beautiful Bella… if that's possible! Looking forward to dinner tonight with the Swan's. Bella, here I come!" _I read out loud.

"That's great, Emmett!" squealed Alice, jumping up and down.

Emmett grinned at Edward in an I-told-you-so sort of way.

"Well Cullen's, who's in for paint ball tomorrow?" grinned Emmett.

"Me, of course!" I squealed.

I looked down at today's entry again, where it mentioned Jacob. Mike and Jacob were friends? Wow. I wonder how long that one had been going for…

Suddenly, my phone rang. I kissed a girl filled the room.

"I kissed a girl and I liked it… the taste of her cherry chopsticks…" hummed Emmett under his breath. I grabbed my phone.

"Hello?"

"_Hi Bella. It's Jake. Where are you?_"

"Jake! It's been a while!"

"_Are you with… them?_"

"If by 'them', you mean the Cullen's, then yes."

"_I was wondering if you could come down to the Rez so we can talk."_

"Sorry, Jake. No can do. I'm kinda busy right now. Can you tell me over the phone?"

"_Um… sure. I was… I was wondering if you wanted to come with me tomorrow. I'm going paint balling with Mike and Jessica and some of your friends and I'd like it if you… if you came too."_

"Oh, I'm sorry Jake. I can't. I've got plans tomorrow."

"_It's him, isn't it? He won't let you come?"_

"No Jake, that's not it at all. And why are you going paint balling with Mike and Jessica? I didn't even know you were friends with Mike! Or Jessica…"

"_Mike and I have a lot in common. You see, at least he lets his girlfriend out to play."_

"Jake, don't start…"

"_Sorry, Bella, I've got to go. I'll talk to you later."_

The line went dead. I hung up and pouted.

"Jake invited me to go paint balling, but I told him we've got plans for tomorrow. He got the wrong idea. He was all, 'Mike and I have a lot in common. You see, at least he lets his girlfriend out to play,' and… he thinks Edward won't let me," I explained.

"Yes, it's always me," muttered Edward.

I went over and he kissed me on the lips. After a while we both jumped back, gasping.

"Wow, those two must get up to some serious kissing!" joked Emmett.

"Anyway, guys, why are _we _going paint balling tomorrow?" I asked, before Edward and Emmett could start a fight.

"To prank Nick, duh!" said Alice, matter-of-factly.

We were going paint balling to prank Nick? Uh huh… right. Like that'd work.

"Um… how, exactly?" I asked.

"Wait and see, Bella," giggled Emmett. Ugh… what a girl!

"Emmett, you're a guy, you're not supposed to giggle," I reminded him. He just grinned at me, the same Emmett grin we were all used to.

"Where's Carlisle?" whispered Emmett to me.

I shrugged and he sighed.

"Cover me," he muttered, running into Carlisle's office.

Ugh… not again. Was he in there doing what I think he was doing?

"Jasper! Oh my god, Jasper. You have got to see this!" cried Emmett.

"Don't you DARE, Jasper Hale!" shrieked Alice, "Porn is off limits!"

"Right…" muttered Jasper.

"Um… Bella? Why is there a dirty picture of you on here?" cried Emmett.

I gasped. There was a dirty picture of _me _on Emmett's porn site? Ugh! Now who could have put that there?

I ran into Carlisle's office.

"Where is it, Emmett?" I asked, looking at a picture of a red headed… ugh. There was no photo of me on that thing…

Emmett burst out laughing, just as Carlisle walked in, looking stern. He was mad. He had forgiven Emmett for last time's porn outburst and decided not to punish him, but the look on his face… and why was he looking at _me _like that?

"Carlisle, it was all Emmett!" I shrieked pointing a finger at Emmett, who gasped, trying to act innocent.

"Bella, I…" began Carlisle.

"Emmett lured me in here! He said there was a dirty picture of me on that thing!" I shrieked, indicating the computer.

"Bella, I…" began Carlisle.

"Emmett…" I began.

"Bella! I don't blame you!" reassured Carlisle, "I live with Emmett, remember? I know how his devious little mind works! This isn't the first time he's been caught looking at porn on _my _computer, if you remember. This time, however, Emmett _will _be punished! Severely!"

Wow. Carlisle could be scary when he wanted to.

"Emmett, give me the keys to the jeep," ordered Carlisle.

"Aw, come on, man. It's just a bit of porn, you know. Porn! Can you tell me that you've never looked at porn in your life?"

"Emmett, hand over the keys to the jeep, _now. _I'm warning you, Emmett Cullen," warned Carlisle.

Rosalie bounded into the room, holding a set of keys.

"Here you go, Carlisle. Remember, if you need a hand with that, I'm right here," she giggled, dropping the keys to the jeep in Carlisle's palm.

"Aw, come on, babe! No porn's as good as you! Don't be jealous…" sucked up Emmett. Rosalie raised an eyebrow.

"If you're good, then… I'll meet you upstairs after Carlisle's finished with you," she muttered, before leaving.

"Right!" grinned Carlisle, looking down at me, "Come on outside, everyone."

--

We were all huddled around the jeep. Alice's pink graffiti was still on Emmett's bonnet from the other night.

Carlisle dialled a number on his phone.

"Charlie? You know how you said that you were looking for a car?" he started.

--

**End of chapter. I'm working on the next chapter already, and I hope you liked this one! Remember, please rate and review so I know what you guys think! What's the point of reading the story and not reviewing? Anyway guys, thanks for all the reviews and subscriptions I've received already. They make my day :)**

**-Bellapouts**


	3. Chapter 3

**BPOV**

A while later Charlie arrived in the police cruiser. He stepped out and went over to examine the jeep.

"It's perfect!" he grinned, then turned to Carlisle, "Are you sure you don't want a price for it?"

Carlisle shook his head.

"Okay then, Bella, what do you think of your new jeep?" asked Charlie, glancing over at me.

_My _new jeep?

"What?"

"Bella, it's yours!" explained Charlie. Carlisle dropped the keys in my left hand.

"Really?" I asked, unsure. They both nodded, watching my expression.

"That's _awesome_!" I squealed, delighted. Edward chuckled.

"If I had known you would react like _that_, I would have bought you a much better car ages ago," he joked.

"Dad, what happened to Nick and Mike and Mr. Newton?" I asked.

"Oh, they left a while ago," he said, looking at his watch, and then he looked at Edward curiously.

"Weren't you supposed to be out with your brother?" he asked.

"We just went to pick up my new cell," explained Jasper. I hadn't even known he was back!

"Oh, well… well… you girls have fun tonight," he said, nodding towards Alice and I. Then he jumped in the police cruiser and we watched him reversing, and then driving down the long sloped road that lead up to the Cullen's house.

--

The next morning, it was time. I had been preparing for this moment all night while I slept. It was time to get out of bed.

"Bella, Bella, wake up," muttered Edward's soft voice.

"Why?" I groaned, hiding myself under his covers.

"Because we've got to go and prepare for paintball."

"Fine."

He pulled back the covers and lifted me off of the bed. He carried me in his arms, bridal style; with my right arm around his neck, down the stairs and into his kitchen. He sat me down at one of the chairs and pushed a bowl of cereal in front of me. It was hard trying to keep my eyes open; what a rude awakening.

I sat down and began to eat my cereal, looking at Edward's appearance. He was shirtless with jeans on his legs.

"Shouldn't you be wearing protective gear or something?" I asked.

He shook his head and grinned when he saw me looking at his chest.

"It's not my fault; I can't concentrate if you've got no shirt on!" I joked.

"Shirts are for humans."

"Maybe you'll dazzle the others so much today that they won't be able to hit you."

He grinned and held up a pair of long black leather pants, a black T-shirt and a big black leather jacket.

"You don't expect me to wear that jacket! It's _huge_! What if I get hot today?" I protested, angrily.

"It's going to be a cold day today. There's no way you'd get hot. That jacket is for protection."

"But what if I get paint on them? Huh? Is Alice going to grab her gun and attack me?"

He chuckled as Alice danced into the room holding a black furry jacket.

"This one won't be so baggy on you. And no, I won't kill _you _if you get paint on that jacket, seeing as I don't let anyone wear anything twice," grinned Alice. I sighed and grabbed the pants, shirt and jacket and ran up to Edward's room to change.

*****

When we arrived at the edge of the forest, we decided to make it look as though we had no idea they would be coming, so we tried to make it look like we had already started. The others ran off to hide whilst Emmett and I crouched behind a bush.

"Why are we hiding?" I asked Emmett in a whisper. He grinned at me and pointed out at the road.

"Look."

I looked over at where he was pointing to see Jacob's rabbit coming into view. Jacob was driving and Nick was in the passenger seat. Mike and Jessica were in the back kissing furiously while Eric watched them, a frown on his face. Jacob pulled up right in front of us and we heard them all getting out.

We jumped up and pointed our paint guns at them. I halted fire, but Emmett managed to get Nick Newton right in the face.

"Bella?" gasped Mike and Jessica.

"Bl… Emmett?" gasped Jacob.

"Oh, sorry. We thought you were Alice and Jasper," lied Emmett. I bit my tongue to stop from laughing.

"What are _you _two doing out here?" asked Jacob, rather rudely, throwing Emmett a cold glance.

"Edward, Alice, Rosalie, Jasper, Bella and I are paint balling today," explained Emmett.

"Really? So are we!" grinned Eric.

"Want to join forces?" asked Mike.

"Sure!" I grinned as Edward, Rosalie, Jasper and Alice jumped out from behind the trees, pointing their guns at the others.

"We'll break up into teams of two," said Emmett. Nick grinned and wiggled his eyebrows up and down at me. Ugh… if he thought I was going to pair up with him…

"But we have eleven. The numbers will be odd," protested Jessica. Emmett looked over at Nick, grinning.

"You don't mind going on your own, do you, Natasha?" he asked Nick.

"It's Nick," he grumbled back.

"Well that settles it!" cried Mike, "Let the war begin!"

Jacob immediately pointed his gun at Emmett.

"TAKE COVER!" he yelled, stupidly, seizing my arm and running into the forest at human pace.

"What's the plan?" I whispered to Emmett.

"The others will keep everyone busy. It's up to us to 'deal' with Nick. We might have help, I don't know."

I peered around the tree to see Nick firing his gun at us. That was it. I would take action. I stepped out from behind the tree and grinned at Nick.

"Hello, Nick!" I yelled turning and heading deeper into the forest, desperate not to fall. He fell for it. Thinking I was alone, he dropped his gun and ran after me. I hid behind a bush as he approached.

"Come out, come out, Bella," he called, "You can't hide from me."

I stood up and he grinned at me wickedly.

"Nick Newton," I said, coldly, pointing my gun at his paint-covered body.

**JESSICAPOV**

Where was Mike? I thought we were supposed to be doing this _together_.

I screamed as I saw Edward and Jasper pointing their guns at me. I turned and ran through the forest, tripping over a loose tree root. This was it. I was going to die! I didn't even get a chance to sleep with Jacob… or Edward for that matter…

**JASPERPOV**

As we approached Jessica, who was lying on the forest floor, Edward burst out laughing.

"What?"

"Jessica has a… crazy mind," he explained, pointing his gun at the back of Jessica's head.

"You're going to…" he started.

"I KNOW! I KNOW! JUST GET IT OVER WITH!" screamed Jessica. Edward shrugged and beckoned for me to aid him. We both pointed our guns at the back of her head and pulled the trigger. Paint exploded all over her head and she screamed.

"MY HAIR!" she shrieked, getting to her feet as she was bombarded with paint from both left and right, "MY HAIR!"

**BPOV**

Nick laughed as he saw me standing there, pointing my gun at him.

"BELLA! WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING HOLDING A GUN?"

I gasped as Charlie approached, in police uniform.

"Ch… Charlie."

"Who gave you that gun?" demanded Charlie.

"It's a paint gun, Charlie. We were paint balling," cried Emmett, jumping to his feet and walking over to us. Charlie frowned and placed his hands on his hips.

"Paint ball?" he grumbled.

"Dad, its just paint. Just a… just a game, you know?" I said, trying to calm him down.

"Bella…"

"Jacob is here too! He's warring against Jasper and Edward… or was it Rosalie and Alice?" I argued.

"Bella…"

"Dad, please…"

"BELLA! I'm not angry with you! I was just out hiking with Sally-Anne. My shift finished early," explained Charlie. I glanced over to his left to see Sally-Anne Yorkie smiling at me. She _was_ very pretty, but she was Eric's mother! That just… ugh. I would be Eric's step sister. Ugh…

"Hi, Bella," greeted Sally-Anne. I forced a smile.

"Hello Mr. Swan. There's a cubs game on tonight," came Nick's voice from behind me. I gritted my teeth. What a suck up!

"Yes. You and your dad should come over tonight to watch the game. You can bring Mike, too," grinned Charlie. How typical of him. The last thing I needed was Nick in my house, let alone _Mike_! And Sally-Anne would probably be there, too.

"Sure, but dad's working tonight, so I'll just bring Mike. I guess I'll see you later, Bella?"

_Later_? There was no way I was going to sit around playing lovey dovey with Nick Newton all night.

"I can't, sorry. I'm having a sleepover with Alice and Rosalie," I said quickly. Charlie raised an eyebrow at me.

"Again?" he asked, annoyed.

"Yeah, we were going to head over to Port Angeles for a bite to eat and a movie," I lied, hoping my face wouldn't give me away. Nick smiled evilly at me from behind Charlie's back.

If this was how he wanted to play, then he had better watch his back.

--

**I apologise for not posting this chapter up sooner. I've been preoccupied. I'll probably update again tomorrow. :) And remember, I LOVE REVIEWS!!! :D**

**-Bellapouts**


	4. Chapter 4

**You know you love me. Review.**

**BPOV**

I sighed as I sat down on Edward's sofa miserably. It seemed every time we tried to prank Nick, he would outsmart us. Why oh why had Charlie invited him over tonight to watch a Cubs game? I hoped that Charlie wasn't beginning to… like Nick. Ugh.

Suddenly, Alice's eyes glazed over. She suddenly burst out giggling.

"Oh… my…" she gasped, clutching her side. I frowned.

"That's brilliant!" exclaimed Edward. I pouted. I was always in the dark, never knowing what was going on. Alice and Edward seemed to be having a silent conversation.

"Of course, run upstairs and do it now," he told her, grinning. She nodded and turned to run full speed up the stairs. Edward turned to me.

"Bella, remember that time you told me you had flirted with Jacob on the beach that time?" he asked me.

I nodded.

"I need you to do it again."

I smiled.

"You want me to flirt with you?" I asked him, playfully.

"No, I don't want you to flirt with _me_."

I frowned. So much for that…

"Well… who do I need to flirt with?" I demanded.

"Nick Newton."

I screamed.

**APOV**

I rummaged in my draw and found what I was looking for. It was a large bottle about the size of Emmett's hand. From the outside, it looked like you could see clear liquid inside. But that was just how it was _designed _to look. For example, you could put tomato sauce in the bottle and anyone looking at it from the outside would only see a clear liquid inside, when really, it was a blood red dollop of tomato sauce. That was the trick of it. Emmett had given it to me for Christmas. It was a vital item for our next prank with Nick Newton.

Nick Newton was in for a hell of a shock.

**BPOV**

After hearing Edward and Alice's plan, I suddenly burst out laughing. It was the perfect prank to play on Nick Newton!

Alice suddenly bounded down the stairs and handed me a small bottle. I frowned.

"But… um… this is just clear liquid? Edward said you were putting…" I started. Alice cut me off.

"I just mixed up a batch upstairs. It's in there alright. The outside of the bottle is supposed to_ look_ like it contains clear liquid. It's a… trick bottle. Emmett gave it to me. You could have coke in there and all you would be able to see from the outside would be clear liquid," explained Alice. I frowned.

"Edward, will you drive me home?" I asked him.

"I'm going on a quick hunt with Jasper soon. We'll be close to the house. Alice can drive you home," he explained. I looked into his eyes. They were on the verge of being black.

"Of course," I muttered. "Well… Alice, do you want to leave now?"

She grinned and bounded out of the front door. I looked into Edward's eyes again.

"Will it work?" I asked him, suddenly unsure. He smiled.

"Of course it will. You won't catch _me _betting against Alice," he joked. I grinned, wondering how Nick would take our little surprise in a bottle…

-

Alice's Porsche pulled up outside of Charlie's house. Nick's car was in the driveway. He and Mike had obviously already arrived to watch the Cub's game with Charlie.

"Good luck. Please lie convincingly. We don't want him to get suspicious. And where's Edward?" said Alice.

"Probably off being a jerk somewhere," I grinned. Alice smiled. I opened the door of the Porsche and stepped out into the rain. I slammed the door and turned to run as fast as I could through the rain.

I reached the shelter of the porch and used the key under the eaves to open the front door.

Charlie, Mike and Nick were sitting at the dining room table discussing the game. Charlie and Nick seemed surprised to see me there.

"Hello, Isabella," greeted Nick. I smiled flirtatiously at him.

"Hey, Nick."

He seemed suspicious for a minute but when I dazzled him with a smile his suspicions disappeared.

"Bells, I thought you were having a sleepover with Rosalie and Alice and going to Port Angeles tonight," greeted Charlie.

"Rosalie had to work tonight so we decided to do it another night. Alice and I didn't want Rosalie to miss out, so we cancelled our plans," I lied. Come to think of it, I didn't even think the Cullen's (except for Carlisle) even _had_ jobs. Charlie grinned, obviously happy that I would not be with Edward tonight.

"I didn't know you were coming, Bells. We were about to order pizzas," said Charlie.

"I'd be happy to cook tonight," I offered. Charlie grinned.

"Sure, Bells."

"Do you need any help?" asked Nick. I wanted to scream at him and tell him to leave me alone and go back where he came from, but instead, I just smiled.

"Sure."

He seemed happy as he jumped up and followed me into the kitchen.

"So they're playing Twilight at the movies tonight, and I wondered if you wanted to go," said Nick, sounding hopeful. I smiled that flirtatious smile I knew he loved and batted my eyelids.

"Of course, I'd love to. But what's Twilight? I don't think I've heard of it. Is it any good?" I replied, mentally shuddering at the thought of watching a movie _alone _with Nick. Nick grinned, happy that I had obliged.

"Oh yes, it's awesome. I've read all of the books. I'm surprised you haven't heard about it," grinned Nick.

"What's it about?" I asked, chopping onions.

"It's about this human girl who moves to this town, and she meets a strange boy there. His name is Ben, her name is Ella. Anyway, this girl develops feelings for the dude. They get closer, and the girl discovers the boy's secret: he is a vampire. Anyway, they get hunted by an evil dude vampire called Jason, who Ben kills. Then the boy leaves and breaks the girl's heart. Then she meets a guy called Macob. Then she nearly drowns at the beach, and her vampire thinks she's dead, so he goes to the royal vamps and asks them to kill him. The girl has to go and save him. And when they get back, Ella is a bitch to Macob and ditches him for Ben, which breaks his heart. Then they get hunted by this chick vampire called Valerie. And Ben kills him. Then Ella and Ben get married and Ella gets pregnant. She nearly dies having her vampire baby and then she gets changed into a vampire by the dude vampire. Then Macob comes back and falls in love with their baby girl. So then they all live happily ever after."

I was clutching the table for support. The movie sounded interesting, and I would probably enjoy it. A girl and guy in love, then the guy leaving (I knew what that was like) and then meeting a guy called Macob and being a bitch. And the rest of it sounded good too. Though I already hated Ella for being a bitch to Macob. I mean, she ditched him for her boyfriend! How horrible is that? But the whole 'vampire' thing scared me for a while. I eventually came around.

"Bella? Are you okay?" asked Nick. I smiled. The word 'vampire' had scared me for a while.

"Sure. Twilight sounds like an interesting movie."

Nick seemed unsure.

"Maybe you should get Charlie to order pizzas," he suggested.

"Sure," I agreed.

"Where's Edward, by the way?" asked Nick. I sighed.

"I _hate_ him! He is such a jerk! All he cares about is his car!" I lied, trying to sound convincing.

"If I were him, I'd be too busy caring about you to even think about cars. He _is _a jerk. You're too good for him. You need someone else. Me, maybe…"

He muttered that last part, but I still heard it. Annoyed, I pulled Alice's bottle out of my pocket and handed it to Nick.

"Here, you can have this. Edward gives me loads of bottles, but I never use them. He thinks he can buy me with _that_! What a loser!"

It hurt me to say that about Edward, but if I wanted to butter Nick up, then I had to do the unthinkable.

"What is it?" asked Nick. "Water?"

He thought it was _water_?

"Um… no, it's not water. What you need to do is pour a bath, and then tip the _whole _bottle into the water. The water causes it to um… change colour. So um… don't worry if it changes colour when you pour it in. It's supposed to um… help your skin. It gives you smooth skin. All you need to do is sit in the bath for a few minutes and it will sink into your skin. It's excellent, apparently. Alice and Rosalie use it all the time. And you need to dip your head under, too. Just so your face is as smooth as your body," I lied. Nick fell for it. He grinned. This was going to be good.

"Awesome!" he grinned, then his expression changed. "So, um… you and Edward…?"

"I'm not very happy with him right now," I lied.

"Good," grinned Nick. I frowned.

"Oh… um… I mean, why?" he added. I sighed. What could I say?

"He's such a reckless driver! It's annoying, really. So um… are you still working as a delivery guy?"

I was eager to get him off the subject of Edward. It was harder to lie about Edward than it was to lie about anything else.

"Yeah, of course. Who knows, maybe I can deliver _you_ a… special treat," he grinned, before giggling. I frowned. I hope that wasn't his way of… flirting. Ugh. And since when did _guys_ giggle?

"Well… you'd better go um… tell Charlie that he needs to order those pizzas right about now," I said quickly, before Nick could 'flirt' some more. He left the room to tell Charlie and I sighed in relief. That _kid _was so annoying! Even though he was a little older than me, he was so immature! He didn't even know how to flirt! At least Mike didn't annoy me. I just… was too interested in Edward to think about dating Mike.

Nick returned and I swallowed.

"I'm going to go up and have a shower, and I think I'll skip dinner. I'm not very hungry. I'll just have an early night. Remember to use that bottle I gave you _very _soon," I lied. He grinned.

"Do you want me to… come upstairs with you? It's very dark up there. You might get lonely."

Flirting again?

"Oh, I think I'll be right," I said, smiling. I skipped up the stairs and into my room. I locked the door behind me and fell to the floor.

"Bella?"

I glanced up, hopeful, and saw Edward stretched out across my bed. I jumped up and lay next to him.

"Nick is so immature!" I complained. Edward chuckled.

"It was worth it, Bella. He'll get the shock of his life when he uses that bottle."

I smiled. He was right. Nick _would _be shocked. I gasped, suddenly remembering something.

"Oh my gosh! I can't believe it! My life just got worse!" I gasped. "I agreed to go to the movies with Nick Newton next Friday night!"

-

**:) Did you like Nick's attempt at flirting? Wow. He is so corny, don't you think? As always, please review! I'm not going onto the next chapter if I don't have at LEAST 5 reviews. I'm sick of only getting a couple for every chapter. :(**

**Oh, and has anyone ever heard of Silent Hill? If you have, or if you haven't, you should really read this story by Ceillo. Even if you haven't heard of Silent Hill, you should still read this story. :) I believe it's a good story, but I'm the only one that ever reviews for Ceillo. So who wants to help Ceillo out by reviewing her story Room 302?**

**.net/s/4909408/1/Room_302**

**x**

**Bellapouts**


	5. Chapter 5

**You know you love me. Review.**

**NICK POV  
**

I sighed as I trudged up the stairs holding the bottle Bella had given me yesterday. She seemed to be full of surprises. One minute she hated me, and the next she was all over me. It must be Edward. I'm sure of it. He's playing with her brain. It must be that big brother of his. What's his name? Emmett? Yeah, that's right. He looks like the type who deals with drugs. I bet Edward's feeding them to Bella.

The more time I spend with Bella, the more she'll willingly open up to me. She said she's having a fight with Edward, so I'm betting that if I can keep her away from him, he won't have the opportunity to drug her.

Just as I reached the bathroom door, my phone rang. I pulled it out of my pocket and quickly answered it. It was unusual for someone to be ringing me.

"_Hey, is this Nick?_" came the beautiful voice of Bella. I smiled.

"Hello Bella," I purred.

"_You know that stuff I gave you? Well I was just talking to Ed… Jessica, and she said she uses it, too. She said not to use it for your body, but to rinse it through your hair. Use it in the shower, if you do use it, that is. I mean, if you don't want it…"_"Oh, of course. I'll go do it now," I said quickly.

**BPOV**I burst out laughing. Nick was in for a shock! I walked over to where Alice was perched on Edward's lounge.

"What are you doing?" I asked her.

"Thinking," she replied casually. I sighed and sat down next to her.

"About what?" I asked. She looked over at me, eyes hopeful.

"They've got sales on down at Port Angeles. You've got a date with Nick Friday night and you need something to wear."

I sighed. This again. How many times did I have to tell her about how much I hated shopping? Who wanted to stand around all day trying on bras and having Alice perving on you using her psychic powers?

"No, Alice!" I said quickly. Alice sighed and looked into my eyes.

"It's such a shame. There are loads of Victoria's Secret lingerie sales today! You need lingerie, don't deny it!" she babbled. I frowned.

"Oh, what's the use?" I muttered to myself. Alice's eyes glazed over.

"Nick's calling in five… four… three… two…"

My phone rang. Curse Alice for changing my ring tone! I opened my phone.

"Hello? Nick?"

"_Bella, have you ever used that stuff that you gave me?"_ he demanded.

"No, but Alice and Edward gave me the bottle especially for you," I replied casually. He groaned.

"Bella, they tricked you! They tricked _us_!" he groaned.

"What do you mean?" I asked innocently.

"It was a trick bottle! Edward and Alice put something in there that made my hair turn rainbow!" he yelled. I smiled to myself.

"What? Why would Edward and Alice do that?" I asked innocently. He groaned again.

"Bella, have you been around Edward today?" he demanded. I frowned. What was this, twenty questions?

"Of course I have. He _is _my _boyfriend_," I said matter-of-factly. He sighed.

"Oh, Bella! I thought you two were fighting earlier?"

"That was then. This is now. And Edward and Alice haven't done a _thing_. You probably just used it wrong. Don't blame the Cullen's for every mistake you make," I told him sternly. He sighed.

"Bella, no! It can't be! Bella, did Edward give you anything to drink today?" cried Nick.

"Um… yeah. Why?"

"He's feeding you pills, Bella. He's trying to control you! Emmett's running a drug business and Edward is helping him. That's why the Cullen's have got so much money! They're bad people, Bella. Stay away from them, please! Promise me you'll stay away!" he babbled. I gasped. Was he _insane_?

"How dare you!" I yelled into the phone. "How dare you accuse Emmett and Edward of… of… of _that_? You don't know what you're talking about! You don't even _know _them. Oh, and our date on Friday night, it's not going to happen. How _dare_ you!"

I pressed end and stuck my phone back in my pocket. At least now I had an excuse to get out of going to the movies with him. Alice was sitting on the lounge giggling, and Edward was chuckling from over at the door.

I grinned.

"That'll show him. I don't know how he got that idea," I giggled. Edward came over and wrapped his arms around me.

"Too much Underbelly," he muttered. I frowned.

"What's 'Underbelly'?" I asked him.

"It's this gangland war TV show in Australia," explained Alice.

"Uh… yeah. Sounds nice," I mumbled. Alice's eyes glazed over. After a while, she jumped to her feet, grinning.

"Looks like we're going to Wal Mart!" she grinned. I groaned.

"Alice, no shopping," I groaned. Edward kissed my nose.

"Oh, you won't want to miss this, Bella. I don't think I want to, either," he whispered. I blushed as he kissed my nose again.

I sighed. How could I say no to _that_?

"Let's go," I grinned.

-

We arrived at Wal Mart twenty minutes later in Edward's Volvo. Alice was busy texting on her mobile. I had never seen anyone text so fast!

"Emmett's just inside the front entrance," she told us. "He said to hurry up. He's getting impatient."

"Emmett's here?" I asked, turning around in the front seat to look at her sitting in the back. She nodded.

"Yeah, he's here. Carlisle's at work and Rosalie, Esme and Jasper went hunting," she told me. "Emmett needs to be here, so we'd better go and meet him."

We got out of the car and made our way up to the front entrance. As Alice had said, Emmett was waiting for us just inside the front door. We made our way over to the toy section.

"Nicky, do you want the pink one with the princess on it?" asked the voice of an old woman.

"Of course, grandma," replied a male voice. I gasped as I saw Nick Newton and his grandmother standing in front of us, with their backs to us.

"Hello Nicky," greeted Alice. Nick and his grandmother spun around to face us. Nick was holding what looked to be a pink nightlight with a princess in a pink dress on the front. His hair was many different colours. Rainbow, as he had said. Our plan had worked!

"Oh, are these your friends, Nicky-poo?" asked the old woman. She grabbed the nightlight from Nick's hands and smiled at us.

"Hello Mrs Newton," greeted Edward, smiling. "Yes, I guess you could say that we're _friends _of your grandson's."

I fought back the urge to snort.

"Right, well I'll leave you to play with your friends while I go and pay for your new nightlight, Nicky," said Nick's grandmother. She held up the nightlight for us all to see. "Nicky's afraid of the dark, you see. Nicky just _loves _pink."

Nick's grandmother walked away, leaving Nick blushing harder than I ever have.

"So… pink, hm?" said Emmett. Nick's blush faded and he glared angrily at Emmett.

"You and your brother leave Bella _alone. _Keep your drugs away from her!" he said angrily. He grabbed my arm and pulled me over to him.

"Unhand Bella, Nick. Give her here so I can drug her," said Edward, angrily. He held up a bag filled with a white substance. I looked over at Nick, waiting for his reaction.

Nick screamed. A security guard walked over to us frowning. He was fat and bald.

"What's going on over here?" he asked angrily. Nick pointed at Edward.

"He's got drugs, sir!" squealed Nick. The security guard looked at the bag in Edward's hand and raised an eyebrow.

"It's rice," he said simply. Nick gasped. He grabbed the bag from Edward and opened it. He pulled out a handful of the rice and stuck it in his mouth. I walked over to Edward's outstretched arms and watched as Nick spat out the rice.

"It's rice!" exclaimed Nick. "Rice!"

I smiled at the security guard. Perhaps now Nick would stop believing that Edward and Emmett do drugs.

"Don't mind him, he's very disturbed. He died his hair rainbow and he keeps escaping from Chief Swan's house. He's staying there until a place can be organised for him to go to. He's mental, sir, and he needs help. That's why they're sending him to the mental home in Seattle," said Emmett quickly. The security guard nodded, understanding. **(A/n: I have no idea if there's a mental home in Seattle, so if there isn't, then just go with the flow.)**

"Chief Swan, did you say?" he asked. Emmett nodded. The security guard gripped Nick's shoulders firmly.

"I'll take him to Chief Swan's house on my way home from work. Is he violent?"

"Yes, sir. He almost attacked my girlfriend, Bella," said Edward. Nick snorted.

"As if I would hurt Bella! You're the one hurting her with your drugs! She loves me, don't you, Bella?"

I frowned.

"No I don't," I said firmly. He sighed.

"Yes you do, Bella. Emmett _really _needs to go to gaol for making so many drugs!" he said casually. Edward frowned.

"See, sir?" he said to the security guard. "He can't even remember my name, and he keeps accusing me of being in possession of drugs."

The security guard dragged Nick away. Nick screamed and yelled as he was carried across Wal Mart.

-

**Lol! I had so much fun writing this chapter! I know I haven't updated in a LONG time, and that this was a really short chapter, but I wanted to end it there. I hope you guys liked this chapter. It is NOT the end, by the way. If you liked this chapter, then please review. I just realised that some of the characters are a bit OOC, so sorry for that, but this is my story. xD**

**x**

**Bellapouts**


	6. Chapter 6

**You know you love me. Review.**

**BPOV**

Walking inside later on, I spotted Nick and Charlie sitting on the couch. Nick needed to do something about his rainbow coloured hair. It made him look like a clown with a big nose.

"Bella!" exclaimed Nick, joyfully. He went to get to his feet, but Charlie frowned at him and pushed him back onto the couch.

"What's going on?" I asked Charlie, innocently. He sighed. He began to explain to me that he had been having a very _interesting _conversation with Nick. I didn't like how he had exaggerated on the word 'interesting'. Apparently, Nick had told Charlie that Emmett was a drug dealer, and he was helping Edward drug me so that I would stay with him. Apparently, I loved Nick, and Edward was preventing our love.

"I love Edward!" I blurted out in the midst of everything. "You know that, don't you, dad?"

As much as Charlie disliked Edward, he knew that I loved him.

"Yes, of course. Now is any of this true?"

I gasped.

"You're not taking him seriously, are you? He's… mental!" I said angrily. Now my own father was against me. Charlie frowned.

"Why was Nick dragged in here by Kevin, who said that some kids tipped him off about Nick's 'illness'. Nick says it was you, Edward, Emmett and Alice."

I was guessing that Kevin was that security guard's name.

"I don't know," I lied, looking at the ground. Charlie sighed.

"Well, Nick's grandmother called a while ago, wondering where he was, and that she had a bad back and couldn't carry Nick's nightlight out to her car. I'm dropping Nick home, and then I'm going to pay the Cullen's a visit."

"What?" I gasped, alarmed. He wasn't going to arrest anyone, was he? I scowled at Nick.

"Bella, I have to take everything into account. I'll just go over, ask some questions, and have a look around," said Charlie. I frowned.

"Don't you need a warrant for that?"

"If they've got nothing to hide, I'm sure they won't mind me having a look around."

-

Charlie and I walked up onto Edward's porch and knocked on the door. Esme opened it the minute I finished knocking, and swung it open to allow us to walk in.

"Hello Mrs Cullen, I hope I'm not interrupting," said Charlie, smiling at Esme. Esme led us into a room where Edward, Emmett, Alice, Rosalie, Jasper and Carlisle were sitting around a large oak table. Two large legs of lamb were in the centre of the table, and random plates of vegetables were scattered around them. Seven plates lined the outside of the table. There was only a small amount of food on each plate. Esme took her seat by Carlisle's side, while Charlie and I sat on the sofa.

"Does anyone want dessert?" asked Esme.

"Nope, I'm full. That was brilliant, Esme," said Emmett, rubbing his tummy. Esme smiled lovingly at him.

"Okay then, that means you and Rosalie are on dishwashing duty," she said, smiling. Emmett groaned. Rosalie got to her feet gracefully, and slapped Emmett's shoulder.

"Okay, okay!" he protested, as Rosalie giggled. He got to his feet and helped her collect all of the dishes off of the table. I didn't understand why they had gone to so much trouble to prepare food that they weren't planning to eat. Had Alice seen us coming?

"We have reason to believe that one or more of your family members has come in contact with drugs," Charlie told Esme and Carlisle. Esme frowned.

"We aren't like that, Charlie. If anyone in this house was, then I would know about it."

Edward frowned at Charlie.

"Esme and Carlisle are wonderful parents," he told Charlie. "They have willingly taken us in. We would never betray their trust."

"Oh, wouldn't we, Edward?" interrupted Alice, smiling. "Remember when Carlisle told Emmett to stop playing around with Carlisle's computer? It didn't end up so well."

"Yes, but he didn't go unpunished. His jeep is covered in pink. It was such a shame that all of the spray painters in town were too _busy _to repaint it," grinned Jasper.

"Yes, wasn't it, _Jasper_?" came Emmett's voice from the kitchen. Jasper grinned.

"As I was saying," interrupted Charlie, "I'm going to need to search your house."

"Feel free," grinned Jasper, "but be careful not to get buried in all of the ripped up clothes Emmett and Rose have lying around their room. They get pretty… into it."

Charlie frowned.

"Perhaps I'll start there then," he sighed. He walked up the stairs and into Emmett and Rosalie's room.

"What was with all of the food?" I asked Alice, the minute he was out of earshot.

"Oh, I knew you were coming. Edward was bored, so he decided to make dinner. But we prefer raw meat," explained Alice. Edward chuckled.

"We had to let Charlie see us _eating _that disgusting food. But not one bit of it managed to get into our mouths," he grinned.

At that moment, Charlie appeared in front of us holding a small bag. It appeared to be filled with white powder.

"I found a whole wardrobe full of this in your room, Edward. Lots of it in a box with photos of a naked lady on the outside," he said, angrily. "Edward, I'm arresting you on…"

Edward cut him off.

"It's not what you think, Charlie."

Rosalie and Emmett glided into the room, hand in hand.

"You're the girl with no clothes on!" exclaimed Charlie, pointing a finger at Rosalie. Rosalie grinned, pushing Emmett away from her. She looked down at her jeans and tank top and groaned.

"The first time I've been happy today," she muttered to herself. Charlie raised am eyebrow at her, before turning to Edward.

"You're cheating on Bella with her, and she's cheating on Emmett. And you're doing porn? Nick was right about you."

Edward had pornographic photos of _Rosalie_ in his room? I frowned at him. He smiled.

"We aren't related, Charlie. And no, we aren't cheating. Those vulgar photos you found in my room belong to Emmett," he said, smiling. Charlie sighed.

"So these are Emmett's drugs?"

Emmett grabbed the bag from Charlie. He stuck his finger in the powder and licked it off. Charlie pulled out his rifle and pointed it at Emmett.

"Put those down!" he ordered. Emmett chucked the bag to him, laughing.

"It's just sherbet!"

I burst out laughing as Charlie lowered his rifle. He stuck his finger in the bag, and tasted the sherbet.

"Oh, yes, well…" mumbled Charlie. "Sorry."

"Emmett, what's the go with you and porn?" asked Jasper, frowning slightly. Carlisle smiled at Emmett.

"You know

"So now do you believe me that Nick was lying to you?" I asked him. "He's obsessed with me, dad. It's not normal. He's mental!"

The Cullen's front door burst open and Nick Newton walked in…

… Holding a gun.

**-**

**Okay, so I know I've been bad with updating lately. But don't worry; I've already got the next chapter ready. You guys will be seeing it very soon. I've had some interesting reviews about Nick, and I agree with you all. He IS weird!**

x

Bellapouts


	7. Chapter 7

**You know you love me. Review.**

**BPOV**

I rolled my eyes. There was no way in hell that Nick would try something in front of Charlie. Did he even know how to use a rifle?

"Nick, where did you get that?" groaned Charlie.

"It… it was in your cruiser," stuttered Nick, he pointed the rifle at Charlie. "Give me Bella, and let us go free, or… or else!"

Edward put his arm around me protectively. He chuckled.

"Oh really? Who are you going to shoot, Newton?" he asked tauntingly.

"Charlie… or… or… YOU," gasped Nick, pointing the rifle at Edward.

"It's not…" began Charlie, but Edward held up a hand to stop him and winked.

"Bella is staying here, in _my _arms. We might open a bottle of '89," said Edward. Nick smiled.

"That rifle isn't loaded!" exclaimed Charlie. Nick groaned. He threw the rifle at Edward's head. Edward ducked, as the rifle went flying through the air and hit Emmett in the head. Everyone looked at Emmett, waiting.

"Oh! Right!" exclaimed Emmett. "Yeah… um… ouch. My head hurts."

-

Nick was lucky to get off with a lecture. Afterwards, he told Charlie that it had all been a joke.

"He never would have shot anyone. He was too scared. And we thought _Mike _was bad news!" Emmett had said after Charlie and Nick had left.

"Emmett!"

I turned to see Carlisle looking furious. Edward and Alice burst out laughing.

"You've been looking at porn again on my computer, haven't you?" he said, angrily. "You managed to get five hundred and sixty-six viruses on my computer, and every time I try to get into all of my files, a naked Rosalie pops up and tells me that I've been a naughty boy!"

"You're about to become a naughty boy, Carlisle," giggled Alice. "You're about to make an Emmett-sized hole in the window!"

Carlisle sighed.

"What is _wrong _with this family?" he asked himself.

"Bella, what's wrong?" asked Jasper, frowning curiously at me. I gulped and put on a fake smile. It didn't fool him.

"Bella? What's wrong?" asked Edward, worriedly.

"Are you okay, Bella?" asked Esme, looking worried.

"Bella? Are you feeling sick?" asked Carlisle.

"Bella?" asked Rosalie.

"Bella, did you think Charlie would get shot?" asked Alice.

"Don't worry, Bella, Edward wouldn't have hurt Nick over a gun!" exclaimed Emmett. "But, are you okay?"

"Nothing's wrong!" I exclaimed, blushing bright red.

Alice's eyes glazed over and she grinned. Edward looked at her. Uh oh. They both knew.

"There's no need to be embarrassed," said Edward, smiling. I sat down on the lounge and lifted my legs up to my chin. I began to shake.

"Um… Bella? We do have a toilet, you know," grinned Jasper. Everyone burst out laughing. I turned bright red.

"Ignore them," said Esme, frowning at everyone. "The toilet's next to Emmett and Rosalie's room."

"We only try to take care of Bella! Humans sometimes need to… _let it all out_," said Emmett.

I sighed, and ran up the stairs.

-

It had been a while since I had heard from Mike. When I mentioned this to Edward the next morning, he chuckled.

"Let's go see for ourselves, shall we?"

We got in the Volvo and drove to school. Spring Break had seemed to be endless. We pulled up next to Emmett's jeep. Rosalie had spent all night working on it. It was now a bright red, the same colour as Rose's BMW.

"Inconspicuous," sighed Edward, as we got out of the car. The bell rang, making me jump six feet into the air.

Edward and I ran (at human speed) to Trig. We burst through the door and got a frown from the new teacher, Ms Marshall.

"Late, Ms. Swan, Mr. Cullen?" she asked monotonously. We took our seats at an empty desk behind Mike and Jessica, who had already lapsed into conversation.

"Mike!" Jessica hissed under her breath. "Everyone else does it!"

Mike sighed.

"Angela and Ben haven't."

"Lauren and Connor have!" said Jessica, angrily. "Bella and Edward have!"

Mike stiffened. I raised an eyebrow at Edward, who was trying not to laugh.

"_Bella_?"

Jessica nodded.

"Please, Mikey? For me?" she pleaded. Mike sighed.

"Condom?"

"Sure," agreed Jessica. Mike smiled at her.

"I love you!" said Mike.

"Sure," she muttered. She leaned forward and passed something to Tyler. He laughed and passed it to Ben. Ben passed it to a girl with shiny blonde hair and glasses. I think her name was Olivia. Her eyes welled up with tears and she turned to gaze longingly at Edward. I raised an eyebrow at her and she shot me a scowl.

I tapped Jessica on the shoulder. She turned and saw me. She gasped.

"Oh, um… Bella. Didn't know you were there." She giggled and turned away. I hated it when she did that.

"Ms. Cauliflower, are you okay?" asked Ms. Marshall, pausing in front of Olivia. More tears streamed out and she passed the note to her. It was on bright pink paper.

"Who gave this to you?" she asked Olivia. Olivia pointed at Ben, who pointed at Tyler, who pointed at Jessica, who pointed at… me!

"Ms. Swan?"

"I didn't write that!" I protested. She sighed and cleared her throat.

"_Edward and I were all over each other last night. So don't get your hopes up that he'll take you to Prom. He doesn't even know you exist. And having sex with me, who can blame him? You've got no hope. Give up now. Or trust me, it'll get much worse."_

"I didn't write that! I'm still a virgin!" I shrieked. Ms. Marshall frowned.

"Detention this afternoon, Ms. Swan. You'll be joining Mr. Newton, who thought it was funny to talk rudely in _my _class!" she shrieked. Mike sat up, looking surprised at hearing his name.

"I heard everything, Mr. Newton," she said, angrily. I groaned under my breath. Ms. Marshall turned back to the board to continue the lesson. Edward passed me a note.

_Don't trust Jessica. She's in league with Nick._

-

**Yay for another chapter :) A really good idea just hit me, so prepare to be amazed. Thanks again for the continuous reviews. It's great to see all of them in my inbox every morning. **

**X**

**-Bellapouts**


	8. Chapter 8

**You know you love me. Review.**

**BPOV**

Edward had promised that he would wait for me out in the Volvo. I still didn't understand what his letter about Jessica had meant. _In league with Nick Newton…_

Hoping that Charlie wouldn't be hearing about this anytime soon, I walked into Ms. Marshall's classroom. Mike was already there. He kept his head down as I sat at an empty desk. Ms. Marshall was sitting at her desk marking essays.

"You know, Mike, I could tell your father about this new way of talking you've adapted. But since your brother here was once one of my favourite students, I guess I'll let it go for now," said Ms. Marshall, not looking up. I gulped and glanced at the door.

Nick Newton was standing there grinning at me. His bright pink shirt clashed with his rainbow coloured hair.

"Nick used to have the most _interesting _ideas in class," she continued, smiling up at Nick. I rolled my eyes. What a teacher's pet!

"Am I allowed to take my brother and girlfriend home now, Ms. Marshall?" asked Nick. GIRLFRIEND? There was no way that _that _would ever happen.

"Of course, Nick!" beamed Ms. Marshall. "But that's a very um… interesting girlfriend you've got there. You might want to take a look at this. I believe Bella to be cheating on you."

Nick walked over and read the note from before. The note that had gotten me into this stupid mess. I watched Nick's face turn bright red in anger. Before he could say anything, I got to my feet and walked out of the classroom.

"Ow! Help! My… my… OW! My leg! Help!"

I looked to my right. Jessica was lying on the ground clutching her right leg, a pained expression on her face. Her books were scattered all around her. I instantly rushed to her side.

"Jess? Are you okay?"

I felt arms pull me back. I was hoisted into the air, and thrown over someone's shoulder. I looked down at the back of their pink shirt. It was Nick!

"Let me…" I began, but was silenced by Nick's hand.

"Shh, Bella. Don't worry. It's all right. Edward's gone now," he soothed. I wanted to scream, I wanted to run, but Nick's firm grip on me wouldn't be easing anytime soon. And his hairy hand blocked my mouth.

He began to walk, Jessica hot on his heels. We walked out into the parking lot. I looked around for the Volvo, but the only car there was Nick's rusty red car. I felt tears forming in my eyes. Where was Edward?

I was thrown into the back of the car. Jessica duct taped my mouth and bound my hands and feet tightly. I heard them get into the front of the car. Nick started the engine, and roared off into the distance.

"You're safe now Bella. Edward is far, far away. I got Jessica to take your cell phone when you had your back turned. I sent an SMS to Edward, telling him that Ms. Marshall was keeping you in longer. I pretended to be you. I told him to go home, because Charlie was on his way. But it's okay, we'll soon be out of here," explained Nick.

"Where are we going?" asked Jessica's curious voice.

"La Push," replied Nick. "A boy called Jacob told me that the Cullen's hate going… URGH!"

A large popping noise sent the car skidding over to the side of the road.

"DAMN IT!" yelled Nick. "I knew I should have put some air in those godforsaken tires!"

"You should have put some more effort into your plans, Newton," said a familiar voice. The back door of the car opened, and I saw the godly figure of Edward.

"Drive!" squealed Jessica, slapping Nick across the face. "DRIVE!"

Edward hoisted me out of the car and gently pulled the duct tape off of my mouth.

"Edward…" I murmured, before he bent down and kissed me passionately. He pulled away gasping and smiled at me. He undid my legs and arms, and allowed me to stand next to him. I looked down at Nick's back tire. It looked as if it had been punctured somehow.

"I popped it," muttered Edward. I giggled and looked in at Jessica at Nick's horrified faces. Suddenly, Emmett appeared. He opened Jessica's door and put a towel to her face. Her head lolled to the side and she became still.

Nick gasped, turning his head away, knowing what was coming. But Emmett yanked his face into position. He pressed the towel to his face roughly. Nick's head lolled and he fell forward onto the steering wheel. A loud honk made me jump. Emmett moved his head and pulled out a black marker.

On Nick's head, in large letters, Emmett wrote _man whore. _On Jessica's head, in large letters, Emmett wrote _transgender. _I giggled.

-

The next morning, Edward and I drove past the big McDonald's billboard outside of the Port Angeles mall. Nick and Jessica were taped and tied to the centre of the billboard, squirming helplessly, just as I had in Nick's car. Nick was wearing only a pair of pink fairy underpants, showing off his hairy black chest. Jessica was in her Wiggles bra and underwear, showing off her hairy back.

I burst out laughing as Edward pulled up. We climbed out of the car and looked up at them, grinning.

"YOU'LL PAY FOR THIS, CULLEN!" yelled Nick. A group of teenage boys and a tall, slimming girl walked over and looked up at Nick and Jessica, grinning. They pulled out a carton of eggs, and began pelting them at Nick and Jessica.

"I don't get it!" the girl yelled up at Nick and Jessica. "Which one of you is the guy?"

The boys burst out laughing.

"Nice fairy underpants!" they yelled up at Nick. "They really clash with your hair!" A few of them wolf whistled teasingly.

Jessica screamed, squirming and kicking.

Quite a crowd was forming now. I saw Nick's grandmother make her way to the front of the crowd.

"Nicky! How DARE you embarrass me like this by wearing DIRTY UNDERWEAR IN PUBLIC!" she squealed, waving her handbag in the air. "I know they're you're favorites, but you have similar pink ones at home."

The crowd burst into laughter.

"Emmett tends to go a little overboard with these things," said Edward, frowning a little. "He doesn't know the meaning of inconspicuous."

"Are you kidding? This is hilarious!"

I turned to see Mike.

"Oh… um… hey, Mike," I greeted. He laughed.

"I hate my brother. I hate Jessica. Do what you like to them. Just send a few shots into the school paper and I'll be happy," he grinned. When he had vanished into the crowd, I turned to Edward.

"What did your note mean? The one about how Jessica was in league with Nick…?" I asked him.

"Jessica is getting desperate. With no one to sleep with, her life tends to get very dull. Nick told her that if he slept with her, then she had to help him kidnap you," explained Edward. I gasped.

"You knew about this?"

"I knew you wouldn't be in any real danger. Besides, that vile Newton had this coming for a long time."

I glanced over at Nick's grandmother, who was still yelling at Nick for wearing dirty underwear. Edward placed a hand on my shoulder.

"Charlie's on his way."

I knew that Nick would blame everything on Edward. He'd love to get him into trouble with Charlie. But I would tell Charlie just what Nick had been up to. I smiled. We were even. There was no way that Nick would tell Charlie what we did, because he knew that I would tell him about Nick trying to kidnap me. Jessica was in the same boat.

"Let's go," I grinned, walking over to the Volvo, hand-in-hand with Edward. I heard Nick screaming in the distance. He really had some major issues.

"Don't worry," Edward told me, "Nick Newton won't be annoying us for much longer."

I looked up at him curiously. I could tell by the look on his face that he wasn't giving anything away.

"Charlie is getting closer," he told me.

"I hope he brings a gun," I muttered, looking up at Nick in his fairy pants.

-

**Is it wrong to laugh at your own writing? If it is, then you had better cuff me now. Still a few more chapters to go. Don't worry; I've got something EPIC up my sleeve. I just had a thought that they should make a really hilarious movie about people playing pranks on each other. I'm not sure if it's been done before, but if it has, then it must have been a bad movie, because I haven't heard of it. But, I mean, come ON! Who WOULDN'T watch a movie like that? It'd be so hilarious!**

**All of your reviews so far have been really great. It makes me feel better to know that people are enjoying my story. So thanks for that, guys. Don't give up on me yet, though. There's no WAY anyone can miss the last few chapters.**

**X**

**-Bellapouts**


	9. Chapter 9

**BPOV**

As I had suspected, when Charlie had turned up to see Nick and Jessica stuck to a giant billboard, with crowds of onlookers cheering and teasing, Nick had kept his mouth shut. According to Edward, he had told Charlie that it was a random male with tats who had done that to them.

He didn't tell Charlie that it was Edward, Emmett and I because he knew that I would tell Charlie that he had kidnapped me. We were even. But I still hated him. And now that Jessica had decided to join Newton forces, well, I guess I hated her, too.

"Think of it this way," said Alice, "at least we have one extra pranking toy!"

I laughed, and then remembered something.

"When Nick was explaining to Jessica where they were taking me, he said that Jacob had told him that Edward's family weren't allowed to go to La Push. So…" I began.

Edward growled, and tightened his grip on me.

"_Dog_," he spat.

"So Jacob must be in league with Nick as well!" I finished. "But _why_?"

Alice sighed.

"I _hate _not being able to see him."

"Remember at paintball, Jacob was sitting next to Nick? It all fits now," said Emmett, grinning. "That should make things more interesting."

"We need to think of something good," muttered Jasper.

"Well, duh!" said Emmett. "Even _Bella _knew that!"

I rolled my eyes. Everyone went silent, thinking. Alice's eyes glazed over.

"I've got it!" she grinned, exchanging a glance with Edward. "I knew something like this would come up! I prepared myself. Shall I go up and find something suitable?"

Edward frowned as Alice dashed up the stairs.

"What's going on?" I demanded. He smiled, as Alice returned.

"Sorry Rose, I hope you don't mind me borrowing these," she grinned, holding up a skimpy wonder woman suit and a revealing pair of blue lingerie.

"What are _those _for?" I demanded. And then it hit me.

"No!" I groaned. Alice smiled.

"What? You don't even know what we're doing yet!"

"I don't think I _want _to!" I exclaimed, looking at Edward for help.

Knowing Alice, she was obviously planning something bad. Something bad always involved me. I knew that much from my experience with Emmett.

"Okay, here's the plan. We're going to toy with Nick's granny and Charlie. Bella put on that wonder woman suit. I'll organise the rest," explained Alice. I groaned as she threw me the wonder woman suit.

Was she making me strip for Charlie?

-

Emmett's jeep pulled up outside of an old looking house.

"This is where Nick's granny lives," said Alice, grinning. "Off you go!"

I gulped and got out of the car. It was hard to walk in the boots.

"Remember: think sexy, _act_ sexy!" instructed Emmett. He was wearing a black suit and a fake moustache. We made our way to the front door. Emmett knocked on the door loudly. The door opened and Nick's granny pointed at me and gasped.

"Put some clothes on!" she snarled.

"She _has_ clothes on," said Emmett coolly. The old lady looked up at him angrily.

"Who are you?" she snapped.

"Are you related to Nicholas Newton?" asked Emmett. The lady nodded.

"You see, last night, Nick hired Isabella for two hours. He didn't pay for her services, and now she's angry," he explained. I pouted. Nick's granny gasped.

"Nick's been a _bad _boy!" she snapped. "I'll be telling his daddykins about this! And I'll be taking away his undies as well! He can go without!"

She slammed the door in our faces. I grimaced at Emmett.

"Don't worry about her, she's calling Mr. Newton as we speak," he told me, as we walked out to the jeep. Alice took off into the distance.

"Nick is going to be in so much trouble!" she laughed. "Now it's time for phase two!"

We pulled up outside of Charlie's house. Emmett pulled out the box with the skimpy lingerie inside and wrote on the top in black marker:

_To Bella,_

_  
You can't hide from me. You know you want me. I'll stop by at midnight tonight. You better be dressed! There's no avoiding me anymore!_

Love Nick.

I laughed as Emmett ran up to the front door and rang the doorbell, dropping the box, before running back to the jeep. We drove off into the distance.

**CHARLIE'S POV**

"I had no idea you were such a great cook!" I told Sally-Anne Yorkie as we sat down to a candlelit dinner. She smiled breathtakingly, just as the doorbell went.

"I'll get it, Charlie," she told me, walking over to the door. I watched as she held up a large box and gasped.

"Charlie!" she gasped. "I think your daughter has a stalker!"

"What?" I asked, alarmed. She handed the box to me. I read the message on the lid, before opening the box to see a blue bra and panties. I sighed.

"It's just the weirdo down the road," I told Sally-Anne. "Don't worry, he's got rainbow coloured hair and last week, he was stuck to a billboard."

The worried expression left her face. She sat down looking curious.

"You should still be worried," she told me.

I needed to keep an eye on Nick Newton. He was trouble. Stuck to billboards, handling rifles, sending my daughter lingerie. Maybe he _was_ mental.

"Eric's always had a bit of a crush on Bella," explained Sally-Anne. "But he'd never dream of doing a thing like that."

I smiled.

"So what's Eric up to these days?" I asked, determined to get her off of the subject of Nick Newton's lingerie.

**NICK POV**

"Dad, I _swear_ I didn't hire a prostitute!"

"Don't lie to me, Nick. If only you were more like your brother!" yelled my father.

I was sick of hearing about Mike.

"Her name was Isabella!" said my grandmother, "and that big man that was with her could have beaten poor old me to dust!"

I gasped.

"Isabella?"

I groaned. The Cullen's were up to their old pranks. I went up to my room and dialled Jacob Black's number.

"_Hey Nick, what's up?" _

"Jake, you won't _believe _what those Cullen's have done now!"

I explained to him everything that I knew and he sighed.

"_You can't let them do this to you, Nick. You need to stand up for yourself. Get your revenge, why don't you?"_

Jacob had a point.

"That's it!" I gasped. "I need to get my revenge!"

**BPOV**

"What about Jessica?" I demanded. "We can't let her get away with trying to kidnap me!"

"What about the _dog_?" snarled Rosalie. "He's had it coming for a while now!"

"You can't go to La Push, but you _can _go to Forks. We get Jessica before we get Jake, okay?" I said quickly. I knew that most of the Cullen's would love to irritate Jacob. And I knew that most of them would love to fight with him, but that was totally out of the question.

"What should we do to Jessica?" asked Emmett.

Rosalie pulled out her phone, smiling.

"_I'll _deal with _her_!"

**JESSICA POV**

My phone buzzed and I picked it up. One message.

_Hi Jessica, it's Nick Newton here. I'm feeling nifty. Aren't you? Meet me at my house. Wear something… nice. My parents and Mike are away for the weekend. I've got the place to myself. Come prepared._

I beamed. My long awaited sex was coming!

-

I arrived at Nick's house in a pink bra and panties. He answered the door and gasped.

"Jessica? What are _you _doing _here_?" he gasped. I smiled.

"You invited me over!" I laughed, pushing him aside and walking in. Why was he so surprised to see me here?

"Go up to your bedroom. I'll meet you there," I instructed. He didn't move. I ran into the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of chocolate sauce. As I turned, I gasped. Mr. and Mrs. Newton were standing there looking horrified, along with an old lady, who was probably Nick's granny.

I froze.

"He's hired another one!" gasped the old lady. "Get her out before she asks for money!"

"Get out of my house!" roared Mr. Newton. "Never return, do you hear me? Prostitutes aren't welcome here! Don't you EVER contact my son ever again! NICK! GET IN HERE _NOW! _YOU'RE IN BIG TROUBLE!"

I squeaked and ran outside. Nick was standing by the door looking horrified.

"You liar!" I spat. "You told me they were away for the weekend!"

"No I didn't!" he gasped. "It was Cullen!"

I stopped.

"What?"

"Yeah, the Cullen's are trying to get me in trouble! Look, I'll explain later. Right now I've got to…" he began.

"NICK! WHERE ARE YOU? IF I HAVE TO COME AND FIND YOU…"

I squeaked and ran out to my car, not wanting to face the wrath of Nick's father.

-

**Lol! So what did you guys think? PLEASE keep reviewing! I'm trying my best to make these funny, so please let me know what's going through all of your minds!**

And in case you didn't know, it was Rosalie pretending to be Nick who invited Jessica to Nick's place. That's why Nick had no idea what was going on. And his family thought Jessica was another prostitute.

**Keep reviewing!**

**X**

**-Bellapouts**


	10. Chapter 10

**BPOV**

As I walked inside I spotted Charlie and Sally-Anne Yorkie having dinner. I groaned silently as I saw her. I didn't want to be Eric's stepsister. He was worse than Mike! Not as bad as Nick, but still, bad.

"Hi, dad," I greeted, making my presence known. He looked up and grinned.

"Hi, Bells. Oh, um… Nick Newton left this for you…"

He handed me a familiar looking box. I opened it and saw the blue lingerie. It was the prank box that the Cullen's had left for him.

"That little perv! Dad, he's coming _here_! I don't want him here… I… I don't need a stalker. I've got enough on my plate."

Charlie fell for my innocence and sighed.

"I'll ring his father."

**NICK POV**

I sighed as I rolled over on my bed. Sent to bed at six O'clock! What a disgrace!

The door burst open and my father walked in, looking furious.

"Guess who was just on the phone? CHARLIE! APPARENTLY you sent LINGERIE to his DAUGHTER! ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND? DYING YOUR HAIR RAINBOW, HANDLING RIFLES, HIRING PROSTITUTES, GETTING STUCK TO BILLBOARDS… AND NOW STALKING GIRLS! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU, SON?"

"Dad, look those weren't prostitutes…"

"WHY CAN'T YOU BE MORE LIKE MIKE? IF YOU GET BORED, GO TO THE BEACH!"

That gave me an idea. I could get a chance to talk to Jacob!

"Actually, dad, I might go to the beach now…"

**BPOV**

I was lying in bed with Edward humming my lullaby, when suddenly, I was awoken by the sound of Edward's cell phone. I jumped as he pressed it to his ear.

"Alice?"

There was a pause, as his face changed into anger. He saw that I was watching him and relieved his face of all emotion.

"Yes, of course. I would have… yes, that's a good idea. Okay."

He pulled the phone away from his ear and sighed.

"Nick's on his way to La Push. Alice just saw him disappear."

I groaned.

"Don't worry about it, Bella. Just go to sleep."

I rolled over and sighed. I felt his cool hand on my neck, which sent goose bumps down my spine. I closed my eyes and pretended to be asleep.

**NICK POV**

I pulled up outside of Bella's house, grinning. All lights were off. I looked up to see that Bella's window was wide open, just calling to me…

I climbed up the tree by the side of the house and jumped onto her windowsill. She was lying in bed asleep. Cullen was no where to be seen. I jumped into the room noiselessly and crept over to her. I pulled out my paints, grinning evilly.

"Hello, Newton," drawled a cold voice. I gasped as I was hoisted off of my feet. Cullen had got me. He grabbed the paints out of my hand.

Bella sat up, looking horrified.

"Bella," groaned Edward. "You were _supposed _to be sleeping."

"What's _he _doing here?" she demanded, angrily.

Edward squirted me with paints.

"The rainbow was fading out of your hair," he told me. "I think I can fix that…"

He squirted the different coloured paints all through my hair.

"Don't make a noise," he muttered to me, as he dragged me out of Bella's room and down the stairs. "Or Charlie will know _exactly _what you've been up to."

He kicked me out of the door and squirted me with the rest of the paint. He threw the empty containers at me and shut the door in my face.

I groaned.

I had been so close!

**BPOV**

Edward came back into my room, smiling.

"Lucky you were here to save me," I reminded him. "Who knows what sort of pitiless torture he could have forced me into?"

"I've got an idea to get back at Jacob for giving Nick the idea to come here tonight," he told me.

I gasped.

"_Jacob _gave him the idea?"

Edward nodded, smiling.

"But don't worry; he'll be sorry soon enough."

**JACOB POV  
**

Quil came running in, his face sorrowful and sad.

"Hey."

He looked up sadly.

"I'm can't believe Sam's dead."

I gasped.

"_What?_"

"You… you didn't know?" he gasped. I shook my head.

"But… _how_?"

"He got into a fight with Paul," whispered Quil, looking away from me. I growled.

"Where's Paul now?" I demanded. Quil groaned.

"Look, Jacob, Sam's dead. Avenging his death isn't going to do anything!"

I sighed. Sam was dead. Sam Uley was dead. Realisation struck me.

"How's Emily holding up?" I asked him. He shrugged.

"Let's go and see how she is," I suggested.

-

We arrived at Emily's. She was dancing around the kitchen baking blueberry muffins.

"Hungry?" she asked, as we walked in, our heads down.

"We're so sorry about Sam," sighed Quil. "If there's anything we can do…"

Emily frowned.

"What's wrong with Sam?" she demanded wistfully. She obviously didn't know what had happened.

"He's… he's gone," choked Quil. Emily laughed.

"I think you boys had better go into the living room."

Quil and I frowned as we went over and peered into Emily's living room. Sam and Paul were sitting on the couch playing videogames, laughing their heads off.

"What? No, that's… Quil! Why'd you joke with me like that?" I growled, turning on Quil. Quil frowned.

"Hey, don't blame me! I was just walking along the beach when Bella came up and told me!"

I gasped.

"_Bella _told you?"

He nodded.

I groaned.

"She got us!" I sighed. Quil frowned.

"Um… what?"

"Bella pranked us. Damn. This puts us behind!"

Quil sighed.

"Man, you _are_ weird."

Bella and the bloodsuckers couldn't hide forever. They'd get what was coming to them…

For a minute there, I had actually thought that Sam was dead. Man, Bella was good.

But not good enough for the forces of Newton and Black!

**BPOV**

Today was a sunny day, and the Cullen's were skipping school for the day. I climbed out of my truck and pulled out my books.

"Hey, Bella!"

I turned and gasped.

"Jacob?"

He was holding a white bucket. He pulled up a white balloon. He pelted it at me and I gasped as I was suddenly covered in red paint. Paint bombs. He kept pelting, as I tried to duck for cover.

When he was finished, he laughed, and hopped onto his motorbike.

"JAKE!" I screamed. "YOU'LL PAY FOR THIS!"

He roared off into the distance. I groaned. I was covered in paint. So much for school…

I hopped back into my truck. I would have to ditch class today as well. When I got home, my hair was dripping with different coloured paints. I rung out my hair, stripped off and got into the shower.

Jacob didn't know what he was getting himself into…

And neither did I.

-

**Lol, how'd you guys like that? Keep those reviews coming! My reviewers give me the excitement to keep on writing. **

**X**

**-Bellapouts**


	11. Chapter 11

**BPOV**

"Bella, Billy and Jacob have invited us down to La Push for dinner," Charlie told me as I walked into the front room.

It had taken four hours to completely remove all traces of paint from my hair. Jacob was so childish sometimes! Well, all of the time, really.

"Um, but I have plans with Edward," I lied. Charlie sighed.

"Bella, you know how much Jacob misses you. You barely see him compared to how much you see Edward. Just call him and cancel. I'm sure he won't mind."

I went up to my room and walked straight into Edward's arms.

"I don't want to go," I moaned into his chest. He sighed.

"I'm sorry, Bella. There's nothing I can do besides kill the mongrel…"

"Edward!" I warned. He chuckled.

-

Charlie and I arrived at Billy's at nightfall. It looked like the whole of La Push were there. Sam was on the barbeque. Charlie waddled over to Billy's side and took a beer from his hand. I sighed, as I looked around. Quil was looking lonely, sitting on a log. I went over and sat beside him.

"That was a mean little prank you pulled," he told me, grinning. "We _actually _thought Sam was dead. Jacob was preparing to go and rip Paul's head off."

I smiled at that.

"Yeah, well I got bombed at school by Jacob. It took me four hours to get all of the paint out of my hair," I told him. Quil frowned.

"Yeah…"

"So where _is _Jacob tonight?" I wondered aloud, trying not so sound obvious. Quil's eyes bulged.

"Um… he's with Ni… with a friend of his somewhere," he stuttered. I raised an eyebrow.

"Nick's here. Great," I muttered. Quil groaned.

"Ugh! I wasn't supposed to tell you! Just tell Jacob it was Embry, okay?"

"I won't be telling Jacob _anything_!"

I stood up and went into the house. It was crowded. I went into a small room with a big bed in the centre. This was Jacob's. I went over to his bedside table, where there was a framed photo of myself sleeping.

I groaned. So now he was sneaking into my room to take photos of me while I slept!

"See anything you like?"

I jumped and whipped around. Jacob grabbed my wrists to keep me from running away. Nick was standing next to him, grinning evilly.

"I honestly thought the bl…" started Jacob, but his eyes shifted to Nick, who was to no nothing about vampires or werewolves. "I honestly thought Cullen would put up more of a fight to keep you away."

I looked away.

"I didn't _want _to come, you know. Not after that little stunt you pulled on me at school."

Jacob growled.

"You made me think Sam was dead! You got Nick into _really _big trouble."

I rolled my eyes at him and removed my wrists from his grip. I went to walk to his bedroom door, but Nick's hands grabbed my shoulders.

"Bella, please don't go," begged Jacob. "We want you to help us prank the Cullen's."

As if! I turned around to face him, knowing I could easily trick him.

"I'm listening," I said firmly. He grinned.

"Nick and I have got a plan to prank them. They won't know what hit them. But the only way we can access them is via you," explained Jacob.

"What sort of plan?"

"Well, we're going to give you the goods so you can…" began Nick, but Jacob cut him off.

"I don't trust her," he said, his eyes narrowing.

"And you obviously don't know me, either!" I pouted. "Do you really think I would do anything to the Cullen's? They're my family!"

Jacob growled.

"_Charlie _is your family. Not _them_."

Nick leant over and grabbed my face in his hands. He began to kiss me roughly. I pulled back, slapping him.

"You dirty mongrel!" I gasped. "Goodbye, Jacob. I'll _never _join the mongrels."

Jacob raised an eyebrow.

"Oh, so we're 'the mongrels' now, are we?"

"Yes!" I pouted. He laughed.

"Then I guess the Cullen's are 'the dark side'," he pronounced.

"The mongrels versus the dark side," muttered Nick. "What a war."

"You're on!" I grinned.

"Bring it on!" staged Jacob.

I pulled out a can of pepper spray and sprayed Nick in the eyes, before turning and running from the room.

"MY EYES!" Nick was shrieking.

**NICK POV**

I knocked on Jessica's door and waited. She appeared within seconds. When she saw me, she frowned.

"Nick?"

"Hi, Jess."

She was so ugly! But if I wanted to snatch Bella from the Cullen's, I would need as much help as I could get.

I explained to her about the prank war, and asked her if she wanted to join our team, the mongrels. She wrinkled her nose in disgust.

"So if I join the mongrels, does that mean I'm going to end up stuck to a billboard again?"

"No, the Cullen's won't do the same prank twice."

Jessica grinned.

"Okay, I'm in. What's the plan?"

**BPOV**

I ran around the side of Jessica's house. Her bedroom window was open. I stuck a small note on the windowsill and ran back to Edward.

**JESSICA POV**

"You know, Nick, I've been feeling a little… _lonely _lately. So much lingerie is being wasted… if you know what I mean," I hinted to Nick. He smiled.

We went up to my bedroom. I saw a bright blue piece of paper sitting on the windowsill. I ran over and looked at it.

_The mongrels can never win. Remember this: WE KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE._

Give up now before it's too late…

_Sincerely, _

_The dark side_

Nick placed a hand on my shoulder, and my eyes darted up to his.

"Don't listen to them, Jess. They're only trying to scare you. They wouldn't try anything funny."

**ALICE POV**

I walked up to Nick's grandmother's front door and knocked loudly. She came to the door, frowning.

"What do you want? Whatever you're selling, I'm not interested."

"It's horrible!" I gasped. "Nick's been cheating on me with prostitutes!"

The old lady's eyes lit up in interest. My head was filled with a vision of Nick getting into trouble. I handed her an envelope full of photos of Nick and Jessica having sex.

"That's the prostitute that Nick had over the other day!" Nick's grandmother was saying, as she looked at a photo of Jessica on top of Nick, naked. "He's been a NAUGHTY boy, and he's in big trouble. What's your name, dearie?"

"Alice," I said, through fake sobs. She sighed.

"I'll punish him myself. His father doesn't seem to care what he does…"

"I know where that prostitute lives," I told her. I gave her Jessica's address. Nick's grandmother smiled.

"I'll get even with this girl. What's her name?"

"They call her Jessica," I told her.

"I'll deal with this one myself, oh yes I will…" Nick's grandmother was muttering to herself.

**JESSICA POV**

There was a knock downstairs. I quickly pulled on a dressing gown, as I was naked, and out to the front door, leaving Nick on the bed.

"I'll get it, dad," I called over my shoulder as I opened the door. An old lady was standing there, looking angry.

"YOU DIRTY GIRL!" she spat in my face. "DIRTY, DIRTY, DIRTY!"

Dad appeared behind me, frowning.

"What's going on here?" I growled.

"I'll tell you what's going on!" shrieked the old lady. She pulled on the cord of my dressing gown. It fell to the floor. Dad gasped, looking at my naked body.

"JESSICA!" he growled. "WHERE ARE YOUR CLOTHES?"

I tried to cover myself up with my hands, but the old lady slapped them away so she could take in my appearance.

"THIS DIRTY LITTLE PROSTITUTE HAS BEEN PREYING ON MY LITTLE NICKY! HE HASN'T COME HOME! I KNOW HE'S HERE!" she yelled. I gasped. Now I remembered her! She was Nick's grandmother.

The boy from next door, Jason, suddenly appeared next to Nick's grandmother.

"What's… whoa!" he gasped, taking in my naked body. I blushed bright red as dad turned on me.

"Prostitute? Jessica, what's going on?" he demanded.

Nick suddenly appeared, looking disgruntled.

"Jess… oh my god! Grandma, what are YOU doing here?"

"Don't you DARE speak to me in that INSOLENT tone!" she snarled, slapping me. "I'LL BOX YOUR EARS, I WILL!"

-

**Lol, so there we have it, another chapter. I was laughing and writing at the same time. I'm just getting so many ideas all at once! Thanks for everyone who keeps reviewing! I'm beginning to memorise reviewers who are reviewing every single chapter. So thanks, lol. Keep reviewing! **

**X**

**-Bellapouts**


	12. Chapter 12

BPOV

I snuck around the side of Jacob's house to his bedroom window. It was wide open. He was snoring loudly in his bed.

"Nick… love… yummy…"

I jumped, but Jacob was still asleep. I wasn't the only sleep talker…

"Yes, I love you… oh Nick… YES! I WILL MARRY YOU!"

I gasped. What _was _he dreaming about?

I climbed through the open window. I crept over to his drawers, and opened his underwear draw. I pulled them all out and stuck them in a plastic bag, and then I climbed out of the window and ran into the bushes.

**JACOB POV**

Nick walked up to me and screamed.

"Nick, what's wrong?" I demanded.

"I LOVE YUMMY SAUSAGES!" he yelled. I frowned, as he pulled out a sausage.

"Yes, I love you," he moaned to the sausage.

"Oh, Nick," I groaned. Nick was kissing the sausage now.

"YES! I WILL MARRY YOU!" he yelled to the sausage.

Suddenly, Bella appeared.

"I'll chop that sausage of yours!" she screamed, brandishing a pair of scissors. Nick gasped, covering his penis.

"No!" he gasped. Bella sighed.

"Not THAT sausage, THAT sausage!"

She pointed to the sausage in his hands.

"It's true, she chopped _my_ sausage!" yelled Edward, appearing out of nowhere. I screamed, as he held up what looked to be half of a sausage.

I sat up in bed, sweating. It had all been a dream.

I went over to my drawers and pulled out a pair of shorts, I opened my underwear draw and gasped. It was empty.

The dark side had stolen my underwear. I groaned. I snuck out of my room and into Billy's room. I opened his underwear draw and pulled out a pair of black underwear.

"Damn, Billy needs to lose weight!" I gasped, as I put the undies on and they fell to my ankles. They were way too big for me. I pulled them up and pulled my pants on.

**NICK POV**

I picked up my cell phone and dialed the Cullen's number.

"_Esme Cullen speaking," _said a female voice. I grinned. Now was my chance. I put on a mature voice.

"Hello, this is Nicholas Stewart from the Seattle police force. I'm ringing about a silver Volvo with eighty-four unpaid speeding fines, a yellow Porsche with sixty-six unpaid parking fines, and a jeep with seventy-nine unpaid speeding fines and twenty-four unpaid parking fines."

"_Really? I'll tell my sons and daughter to pay them right away, officer. I'm sorry for any inconvenience this has caused. I'll punish them appropriately. Thank you for calling."_

I hung up the phone and began laughing my head off. I couldn't believe she had fallen for it!

**BPOV**

Esme came storming into Edward's living room.

"I just had a call from the Seattle police force about Edward, Alice and Emmett not paying speeding and parking fines."

Emmett gasped.

"What are you talking about? Rosalie banned me from going to Seattle after I talked to that sexy blonde with the tats!" he protested.

"The mall in Seattle never has anything worth buying!" sighed Alice.

"I spend most of my time with Bella, and we have never been to Seattle together," said Edward.

I smiled at the looks on their faces.

"Who called?" I asked Esme. She sighed.

"He said his name was Nicholas Stewart," she told me.

Emmett gasped.

"The mongrels!" groaned Alice.

"Esme, you DOOB!" exclaimed Emmett. "You've just been pranked by Nick! Damn! How could you ruin our perfect unprankable reputation like that?"

Esme frowned.

"It wasn't Nick. It was a police officer. I want all of those fines paid. I'll be confiscating all of your cars until they get paid," she said strictly.

"How can we pay fines we don't _have_?" groaned Emmett. Esme frowned at him as she took his car keys. She took Alice's and moved on to Edward.

"How is Bella supposed to get to school if I don't have a car?" he asked her. She smiled.

"Bella has a car," she mused. I grinned.

"Yes, Bella _does _have a car," I laughed. Edward frowned, handing over his car keys.

"For now," he muttered. I frowned.

"What was that?"

"Nothing, love."

**JESSICA POV**

I sat up in bed and gasped. Jason front next door was peering through the window.

"What are you doing?" I demanded. He jumped.

"Oh, you're awake. I um… was just… wondering whether your body was real. UM! I mean, wondering whether those boobs were fake… um… no, um… I was um… just saying hi."

He disappeared. I raised an eyebrow. Was he stalking me? For a moment, I was shocked.

I grinned suddenly. I had a stalker! Yay! I wonder what he _really _thought of my body. I picked up my cell phone and dialed Lauren's number.

"Guess what? I've got a stalker! Yay!"

BPOV

"Why are we trashing Jessica's dad's car?" I wondered aloud. Alice giggled.

"He lets Jessica borrow it sometimes. We'll make it look like _she _inflicted the damage on the car…"

A boy was peering through Jessica's bedroom window. Alice took out a baseball bat and smashed the front part of Jessica's dad's car. She dented the bonnet and smashed out the windscreen.

"Let's go," she hissed, darting into her new green Lamborghini. I jumped in and sat on the seat beside her. She handed me a box.

On the top, there was a label.

_Dear Nick, you left your clothes at my house last night. Why'd you run out on me like that without paying? I'll see you tonight. _

I smiled.

"Nice," I approved fondly.

"Just stick it on his front doormat and ring the bell, okay?" ordered Alice. I nodded. She pulled up outside Nick's house and I ran up and stuck the box on his doormat. I raced back to the car as Alice drove off into the distance.

JESSICA POV

"He saw me naked the other day. Do you think he'll start taking photos of me?" I was saying to Lauren. I was so excited that I had a stalker.

"_Yeah, you'd better stock up on sexy lingerie," _said Lauren.

"Yeah, I'd hate it if he took an ugly photo of me. I can just imagine him pinning photos of me onto his bedroom wall and showing his friends. Oh, Lauren, this is so exciting!"

My bedroom door burst open. My father walked in looking like he was about to poo, frustrated and deep in concentration.

He grabbed my cell phone and threw it out the window.

"OW!" came Jason's cry. "That hit me in the head!"

I smiled. I had a stalker!

"What are you smiling about?" growled dad. "How dare you wreck my car like that, Jessica! I would have thought better of you. Prancing around the house naked… GROW UP JESSICA! I'M CONFISCATING YOUR CREDIT CARDS. YOU CAN SPEND THE REST OF THE DAY IN YOUR ROOM THINKING ABOUT WHAT YOU'VE DONE!"

"Yay!" came Jason's voice. I glanced over to see him peering into the room. He gasped when he saw that I was looking, and ducked.

I grinned, as dad strode out angrily. I had a stalker! A stalker who smashed cars as a sign of attraction! I was so lucky!

NICK POV

"You've been sleeping with prostitutes again, haven't you?" growled grandma. I was tied to the bed in the shape of a starfish, naked. I squirmed helplessly. Grandma slapped me across the face.

"No!" I protested. "I haven't!"

"Don't LIE, Nick. We've got all night."

I hated it when mum and dad took Mike out to parties and left me with grandma.

"YOU'VE BEEN A NAUGHTY BOY!" she yelled, pointing at my legs.

"IT'S DIRTY! WHERE'S THE TOILET BRUSH? I'LL HAVE TO CLEAN IT."

-

**I had so much fun writing this chapter. Jessica is so weird. She actually LIKES having a stalker. Poor Jacob, having to wear oversized underwear, lol. **

**X**

**-Bellapouts**


	13. Chapter 13

**BPOV**

I made my way down the stairs sleepily. Edward was out hunting with Jasper and Alice, and so I had spent the night alone.

Charlie was sitting in the kitchen munching on burnt toast.

"Hey Bells," he greeted.

"Morning dad."

I sighed as I sat down next to him.

"Shouldn't you be at work?"

Charlie chuckled.

"Aw, Bells. Don't I deserve a day off every once in a while?"

I grinned.

"Yeah, but you never have days off."

"Which is why I've got today all sorted out. I know you've got school today, so tonight I was planning on taking Sally-Anne Yorkie out. She suggested to me that I should invite you, because she's bringing her son, Eric. So how does that sound?"

I groaned silently. Dinner with the Yorkies? What was Charlie getting himself into? More importantly, what was he getting _me _into?

"Um, sure dad. Yeah, sounds good."

I grabbed my bag off of the table and headed over to the door. I had to get out of here.

"Bells, aren't you having any breakfast? It's a little early to go to school, isn't it?" called Charlie, as I opened the front door.

"Not hungry," I mumbled, before shutting the door and blinking out at the thick rain that was falling. Squinting through the rain, I could see the Volvo parked behind Charlie's cruiser. I ran through the rain and made my way over to the Volvo.

I opened the car door, to see Edward sitting in the driver's side grinning casually.

"Hi Ed… ARGH!"

I slipped on the wet driveway and fell face flat onto the ground. Edward was at my side in an instant.

"Bella, are you okay?"

"Let's just go before things get any worse," I mumbled. If that was even possible…

**ERIC YORKIE POV**

I was leaning against a wall, munching on a banana, thinking about Megan Fox, when I spotted Jessica making her way over to me through the crowd.

"Hi Eric!" she greeted, grinning at me. I raised an eyebrow. _Jessica _talking to _me_?

"H… hello Jessica," I stuttered.

She smiled widely, showing off her pearly white teeth. She pulled a tube of lip-gloss out of her bag and began to gloss her lips. Then she put the lip-gloss back in her bag and grinned at me.

She was just so hot. She reminded me of that Megan Fox porn video I had seen a week ago. I glanced at Jessica's boobs. Oh, too small. Yeah, she's not Megan Fox...

"We've got first period together. Will you walk with me?" she asked. I gaped at her in awe. This was a whole different Jessica.

"Um… s… sure, Jessica," I stuttered. She grinned.

"Great."

She linked her arm in mine and we began to make our way to Trig.

"So I hear you're having dinner with Isabella Swan tonight, Eric."

"It's Bella, and um… yeah, I am. Do you think I've got much of a shot with Bella?" I said quickly. I was gaining confidence now.

"Eric, I know that you love Isabella with all of your tiny heart, but Isabella is a mean and cruel girl. She sleeps with men and then forces them to pay her so that she doesn't tell their parents," sighed Jessica. "I understand that you like her, but I just don't want to see you get hurt. I care about you, Eric."

"Bella does that? Oh, I never knew. Thank you for caring, Jessica."

"Eric, I was talking to Isabella only yesterday. She told me that you're next on her sex list. She's going to force you to sleep with her, and then make you pay her so that she doesn't tell your parents. She said she's going to get you in bed tonight."

I gasped.

"What?"

Jessica sighed as we stopped outside our Trig classroom. I didn't think I wanted to have sex just yet. I mean, Bella's a great girl and everything, but I'm not quite ready yet. I need to watch more sex videos so that I can learn some sort of technique.

Besides, if I sleep with Bella, those big brothers of Edward's will bash me up, or worse... nipple cripple. I shuddered. After my last nipple cripple by Tyler, my nipples had been very tender, and I experienced occasional stinging.

"We're a little early," she noted.

"But Isabella is so nice to me!" I protested.

"It's all an act. She gets the Cullen's to help her with her little money hungry schemes. That's why the Cullen's are so rich, and that's why Isabella comes to school in designer clothes. There's a group of us that are warring with the Cullen's and Isabella at the moment. Me, Jacob Black from La Push and Mike Newton's brother Nick."

"What sort of war?" I asked.

"A prank war. You see, Eric, if we can prank the Cullen's and their precious Isabella, then they will get sick of us and move to a new town. They're ruining everyone's lives, Eric. Even ours. I don't want to see you get hurt. I want you to join our pranking group, to help rid us of the Cullen's and that girl for GOOD."

I sighed. I had never known that the Cullen's were so horrible!

"Okay, Jessica, I'm in. What do you want me to do?"

**Jessica POV**

As soon as Trig was over, I ran out of the classroom and dialed Nick's number.

"_Did you do it?" _

"Yeah, he totally fell for it. I fed him some story about the Cullen's and Isabella being evil, and trying to steal everyone's money. He's going to help us. I've told him what to do."

"_What a fool. Good work, Jessica. Jacob will be pleased."_

I pressed the end button and smiled to myself. Isabella Swan and her gang of attractive Cullen's were going DOWN.

**BPOV**

I stumbled into the restaurant, Charlie by my side. I was wearing a black strapless dress and Charlie was wearing a suit.

I spotted Eric and Sally-Anne sitting by themselves at a quiet table. Charlie and I went and sat with them.

"Hey," greeted Charlie, bending over and kissing Sally-Anne on the cheek. I shuddered.

"You look nice," noted Eric, nodding in my direction. I didn't want to be mean to him, so I smiled.

"Thanks, Eric. You look… nice, too."

Nice was an exaggeration. Eric was wearing a yellow shirt with a bright orange tie and long jeans.

Eric frowned slightly, as Charlie and Sally-Anne lapsed into conversation.

"So Bella, did you know that bananas are actually very unhealthy food items?" grinned Eric. "Before being sold, many people manage to touch the banana in question, spreading all sorts of germs and diseases. I've always been a bit of a…"

"Um, yeah. I think I'm going to go to the bathroom now," I said quietly. Did he know that nothing he said made sense?

I made my way to the bathroom and went in silently. I felt hands on my back, and I was knocked to the ground. I felt someone undoing my zip.

"What are you doing? Let me go! Let me go! My dad's a cop, he's right outside and he'll be wondering where I am!" I squealed. My dress was pulled off and I was rolled over on the cold bathroom floor. Jessica Stanley and Nick Newton were holding me down.

Nick was wearing nothing but a pair of white underwear, and Jessica was wearing long jeans and a red shirt.

"What are you doing?" I gasped. I was lying on the floor in a bra and underwear, squirming under Jessica and Nick's grip.

Nick and Jessica hoisted me to my feet.

"Wow, you look hot in a bra," said Nick, fumbling with the back of my bra.

"No, leave it on! Leave it on! Now's not the time for _that_. You get it later, remember? Remember the plan?" hissed Jessica. Then she opened the bathroom door and shoved me out. There were gasps from all around the room, as I stood there in my bra and underwear. Suddenly, Nick fell on top of me, and I was pushed to the ground.

Nick started moaning and pushing his knees into my back.

"Oh yeah, baby, Bella, you're so good… oh YEAH."

I gasped as Charlie walked over.

"Bella, what's going on here? You said you hated this boy, and now you've been _sleeping _with him?" growled Charlie.

"No Char… dad! I didn't sleep with him, he took all of my clothes off and…"

"Bella, get outside _now. _Newton, go away, or I'll have you in a cell for the rest of your life."

"Dad, I'm in a bra!"

"_Now_, Bella."

**EDWARD POV**

"Those mongrels will pay for what they did to Bella," I growled. "And I know how we can get back at them."

-

Emmett and I arrived at Bella's house. We got out of our car and began to chuck paint bombs at Bella's house. It didn't take long before Bella's house was rainbow-coloured. Then I stuck a note on Bella's front door.

Emmett and I drove away laughing our heads off.

**CHARLIE POV**

I pulled the police cruiser into the driveway and gasped. Our lovely house was now rainbow-coloured, and clashed horribly with the nearby trees.

"Oh my," gasped Bella. We got out of the car and went over to the front door where a note awaited us. I picked it up, growling.

_Dear Bella, _

_Your house looked so ugly, so I decided to give it a makeover. I know you told me to stay away from you, but I saw you at the restaurant tonight and you just looked so damn HOT. I followed you into the bathroom, and took all your clothes off. I know you said you didn't want to have sex with me, but you were just teasing me. You love me, Bella. You just need some help figuring it out. _

_Love, Nick._

"So Newton did take your clothes off and try to rape you," I gasped, turning to Bella. "And then he decided to bomb my house!"

Bella's eyes filled with tears.

"Dad, I'm so scared of him now. What if… what if he tries to rape me again?"

"Bella, get inside and lock all of the doors and windows. I'm going to go and sort out Nick Newton once and for all."

**BPOV**

I was guessing that Edward and Emmett had paint bombed our house, and then left the fake note from Nick, to make it look like it had been Nick.

I hoped that whatever Charlie did to Nick would be good…

Nick Newton is a goner.

-

**Okay, I know it took me ageeeeeeeeeeeeees to update, but, hey, I've been busy. Anyways, (and this is a promise, yeah?) I'll update soon.**

**Thanks muchly to all of my fantastic readers who encouraged me to update. : )**

**x**

**-Bellapouts.**


	14. Chapter 14

CHARLIE POV

Nick Newton was going to pay for what he had done to my poor Bella, and my beautiful house. I was on my way over to his place now. My phone began to ring. I picked it up.

"Hello?"

I pulled over on the side of the road. "_Hey Charlie, it's Alice. We just got home and our house looks like it came out of a swamp. It's covered in paint of every colour, and Esme is torn. We're all very upset. But Carlisle and Jasper managed to spot Nick Newton running into the bushes when we pulled up in the driveway. It looks like he bombed our house with paint." _ "Oh Alice, tell Esme that I'm on my way to the Newton house right now. You see, your house wasn't the only one given a 'makeover'; Nick Newton did ours as well. Even left a note… yes, well, you tell Esme that I'll have the Newton's pay you back for all the damage done."

"_Of course, Charlie. Thank you."_

I hung up the phone and put it back in my pocket. Nick Newton was going to get the shock of his life. JACOB POV

I pulled up in Nick's driveway behind Charlie's police cruiser. This didn't look good. What had the Cullen's framed Nick for _now_? I walked up to the front door cautiously. It was open. Someone was yelling inside. I walked in. Everyone was in the living room. Nick, Charlie, what looked to be Nick's grandmother, Mike, and Nick's parents. "I'm sorry, okay? It wasn't me, it was those…" Nick was mumbling, sadly.

"You should have thought about _that _before you _ruined _my house!" growled Charlie. "And don't go trying to hang this on the Cullen's, Newton. You tried to rape Bella, too, didn't you? You're lucky I don't go straight to the police with this! I could have you away for years! You'd never get the chance to 'love' Bella then, will you, Newton?"

Nick looked like he was on the verge of tears. "YOU'RE A NAUGHTY BOY, NICKY!" the old woman was yelling. "I TOLD YOUR PARENTS THAT YOU OUGHT TO BE DISCIPLINED, BUT NO ONE LISTENS TO OLD LADIES. BACK IN MY DAY, YOU WOULD HAVE BEEN HIT WITH THE KANE! BOYS BACK IN MY DAY WERE DISCIPLINED! THESE DAYS, BOYS ARE ALLOWED TO ROAM FREE SLEEPING WITH…"

"Grandma," said Mike. "It's a form of abuse to use the kane, nowadays."

"Celeste," said Mr. Newton, turning to the old woman. "We _know _how to discipline our son."

"Hey guys," I greeted. Everyone looked over at me, surprised. "Jacob?" asked Charlie, uncertainly. I grinned, glancing over at a nervous-looking Nick, who was slowly inching away from his grandmother. "Oh hey Charlie, I'm just seeing if Nick's home… and, he is."

Nick's grandmother hit Nick with her walking stick on the back of his left thigh. "Say hello!" she snapped. "Hey Jacob," he said. He went to walk over to me, but his grandmother pulled him back. Nick's face fell and he sighed. "We're very sorry, Charlie. Please don't involve the police. We'll pay you and the Cullen's back to repair the damages, and we'll discipline Nick in our own way," said Mr. Newton. Mrs. Newton was very pale, and her face showed no emotion. She was staring out into space. Nick had once told me that his mother was into porn. Glancing over at her now, I could see that there was a look of longing on her face. Probably wanting to get back to the porn videos. Here she was, standing and talking for no reason, when she could be watching 'sexy' men parade back and forth across a TV screen. Oh yeah, that sounded like _loads _of fun. I mentally rolled my eyes. "Of course, Mrs. Newton. Well, I'd better be off. Bella will be wondering where I am. Goodbye," said Charlie. He turned and walked out the door, throwing me a very suspicious look before leaving. "Nicky's been a BAD boy, and he's not allowed to play with the other little boys today," snapped Nick's grandmother. Mr. Newton frowned. "Celeste, please. Nick's not going to learn anything if you're continuously babying him like he's a three-year-old!" he sighed. Mrs. Newton groaned. "OH WHAT IS THE POINT?" she screamed. "WE'VE GOT BETTER THINGS TO DO THAN TO STAND AROUND ARGUING FOR NO REASON!"

She turned and stormed out of the room. Nick's grandmother _tsk_ed. "He's just like his mother," she sighed. "No discipline whatsoever. Running off to watch her porn videos every chance she gets…"

"It's getting late, Celeste. I'll drive you home," suggested Mr. Newton, his face looking sour. "UM, actually," I said, moving closer to Mr. Newton. "You should probably stay here with your wife and sons. I'm heading home now, anyway, so I'd be happy to drive the young Mrs. Newton over here home."

Nick's grandmother frowned. "You're not flirting are you, boy?" she snapped. I gasped. "Oh no! I wouldn't dream of doing such a thing!" I gasped. "Yes, Jacob. Perhaps it would be better if you drove her home…" said Mr. Newton. I grinned. A few minutes and a tantrum from Nick's grandmother later, I found myself in my Rabbit driving an old woman home. "So you said that Nick's been a bit naughty…?" I said lightly, trying not to make it sound obvious that I was desperate to know what had happened. "Naughty, naughty boy… naughty… yes, naughty boy, indeed. Throwing paint bombs at nice policemen's houses… and that Cullen house as well. I never did like those Cullen's. Always thought they were a strange lot. Keep to themselves, driving around town with girls hanging off of their every word… naughty, naughty children…" mumbled Nick's grandmother. I gasped. "Nick threw paint bombs at Charlie's and the Cullen's houses?" I exclaimed. Nick's grandmother frowned. "Yes, boy. That's what I just said! Of course, he's too naughty to admit that it was him who did it. Said it was the Cullen's, trying to frame him. That policeman said that Nicky left him a nasty note, too. Naughty, naughty children. That was the biggest mistake ever made, getting rid of the kane. Back in my day, little boys like you and Nicky were disciplined and well mannered. Now with naked girls and naughty, dirty…"

"Yes, this is your house. Bye, now."

We had arrived at her house. I opened up her door and she got out angrily, hitting me over the head with her handbag. "Rude, arrogant little boy. Naughty, naughty…" Nick's grandmother was screaming as I drove off into the distance. I heard something hit the back of the car, and turned around to see what it was. A small crack was visible on my back windscreen. "Damn," I cursed.

JESSICA POV

"I know! And I was like, what, and she was like, I did warn you. Ugh. They're like… so smart. I know! It's like really weird. Oh yeah, I totally agree. She's so ugly, too. I know, that's what I said. But he was like oh my gosh, and she was like, this is so weird. And I was like, I KNOW! But that was like so weird, cause then I was like it's a f… oh, wait. Call coming through. Hang on Lauren, I'll ring you back later."

I hung up on Lauren, just as my next call came through. Jacob. "Hey Cub, what's up?"

"_Don't call me Cub. It's annoying. Yeah, so I was just over at Nick's, and Charlie was there. I knew that the Cullen's had done something, but I wasn't sure what. Anyone, I drove Nick's grandmother home and she told me some interesting information. This is what I think has happened. The Cullen's paint bombed theirs and Charlie's houses. At Charlie's house, they left a fake note that said it was from Nick, and Charlie got angry. The Cullen's claimed to have seen Nick Newton running into the bushes at their house, at the scene of the crime."  
_  
"Oh. Is he going to jail now?"

"_No, but his parents have to pay back all the damages done, and Nick's in really big trouble. Here's what I think. We need to meet up with Eric and plan our revenge on the Cullen's, okay? We're one member down, but we're not giving up."  
_  
"Okay, well, ring me when you know what's happening. Bye Cub!" "_Don't call me Cu…"_

I hung up on him, frowning slightly. The Cullen's had eliminated Nick. At least for a while, anyway. This was getting dirty. I sighed, staring up at my bedroom roof.

I was lying on my bed, not because I wanted to, but because my dad had sold my car, saying that I didn't deserve it. So now I had to wait for Cub to come and pick me up. Cub is a good nickname for Jacob. I wonder why he doesn't like it?

"Wow, I can see her left boob!" cried an excited voice. I glanced over at my bedroom window to see Jason standing there, gawking at me. When he saw me looking at him, he ducked. I smiled. Having a stalker is so much fun!

Today, I was really upset. Forks Magazine had been running a competition. They had been looking for the perfect person to interview. I had sent in my application a week ago, but today, when opening up Forks Magazine, I saw that they had given the interview to Rosalie Hale. I had been so upset. Name: _Rosalie Hale  
_Age: _18_ Relationship status: _in a relationship with Emmett Cullen  
_Likes: _shopping, hiking  
_Dislikes: _snails (they're so gross!)  
_  
I stopped reading and gasped in amazement. Rosalie hated snails! I grabbed my phone and dialled Jacob's number. This was going to be fun…

ROSALIE POV

I walked up the stairs and lied on my bed, waiting for Emmett. I pulled back the covers and jumped into bed. The minute my back touched the bed, I screamed and jumped ten feet into the air. Hundreds of snails covered the bed. I screamed, jumping about flicking snails off of me. I could feel them sliming up my back, and I was still screaming. I ran into the shower and turned the water on, desperate to get them off of me. I gasped. No water. I grabbed a bottle of bodywash, and tipped it all over myself. I screamed. Big mistake. Someone had filled the bottle with snails and snail slime. I was covered in snails and slime. "Rose, baby, what's… oh no!" said Emmett, running over to me. He began pulling snails off of me. I slapped his hand away. I jumped out of the window and ran over to the small river by our house. I jumped in, desperate to get rid of the hideous things. - Later, when I was clean and refreshed, I went upstairs, smiling to myself. That was when I noticed a note on my bedroom door. _I hope you enjoyed our present._

Love, Jacob, Jessica and Eric. I screamed. They would pay for this! No one did such a horrible thing to Rosalie Hale and got away with it. I got into the BMW with Emmett, and we drove over to the mall. Jacob had a job here, now, and sure enough, his precious car was parked near ours.

We got out and ran over to it. Using my car keys, I scraped the side of the car, scratching off the paint as I went. I managed to scratch out a big love heart. I grabbed a can of pink spray paint out of the BMW and ran back to the car. I filled in the love heart with pink spray paint, grinning gleefully. Then, using my car key, I wrote 'Team Edward' in the middle of the heart.

Next, Emmett got out cans of rainbow spray paint and began to graffiti the car. A glance at the mall alerted me to the fact that Jacob was on his way out. One last item. I pulled out a can of orange fizzy, and poured the whole lot onto Jacob's bonnet. It would eat the paint in minutes!

Emmett and I ran over to the BMW, and waited. When Jacob saw his car, he screamed.

"DAMN! OH LORD! OH NO! OH CRAP! NO INSURANCE! OH NO… LOOK AT THE BONNET! OH NO! OH BOY… STUPID…"

That was when he saw me and Emmett in the BMW, bursting with laughter. "YOU'LL PAY! YOU'LL PAY! I'LL MAKE SURE I DO IT PERSONALLY! YOUR CARS AREN'T SAFE… THE SNAILS ARE COMING TO GET YOU! WATCH OUT, BARBIE!"

Revenge is sweet. - Yay. Another chapter finished. See? I'm being nice now. I've updated twice in the last week. How nice am I? Thanks for all your reviews on the last chapter, guys. You guys are fantastic readers, and I love you all. With Rosalie being scared of snails, if any of you guys read Evil Little Prankster (this is the sequel to Evil Little Prankster), then you might remember in chapter three of Evil Little Prankster, when Rosalie and Emmett were trying to make out in Alice and Jasper's bed, and they found an open jar of snails, and Rosalie freaked out. (:

x

-Bellapouts

_  
_


	15. Chapter 15

JACOB POV

I pulled up in Jessica's driveway and gasped. Bella was stumbling down the driveway, grinning and laughing, a dazed expression crossing her face.

"Hi Jakey!" she laughed, as I ran over to her.

"Bella, are you okay?" I gasped. She smelt strongly of alcohol.

"Woof woof!" she giggled. I frowned.

"Bella, let's go for a drive."

I lead her over to my car, and got her to sit in the passenger seat. I started up the car and drove off into the distance.

"So what were you doing at Jessica's, Bella?" I asked, peering over at her. She still looked dazed, and looked tired.

"Well Edward went hunting, and Emmett got me drunk!" explained Bella. She giggled again, and leaned back in her seat.

There was no way I was taking her back to the bloodsuckers. This was a prank war, and we didn't get many chances to prank the vampires.

Bella groaned and vomited all over herself. I frowned. We had just crossed into Quileute land.

**QUIL POV  
**

"Is that Bella?"

"Whoa, dude, she's covered in spew," I gasped. Embry laughed.

"Come on, let's go check it out."

We raced over to where Bella lay moaning and groaning in the front seat of Jacob's rabbit.

"Will you get a whiff of that!" gasped Embry, pointing at Bella's spew. I laughed.

"Boys!"

I gasped, as Jacob knocked me to the ground. He scrambled off of me and grinned as I got to my feet.

"What's with Bella…?" I wondered aloud. Jacob grinned.

"She's drunk. But it wasn't me. It was the bloodsuckers. And now, I've got her at my mercy. It's time for some… pranking."

Embry laughed and patted him on the back.

"Nice one, mate."

Jacob grinned.

"So, are you guys in?" he asked. He looked from Embry to me. I looked away. Bella had always been nice to me. Why should I do this to her? No, it was time for me to repay her for her kindness.

"Sure," grinned Embry, high fiving Jacob.

"I'm in," I agreed. Jacob smiled.

"Well then, men. Let's get to work."

**EMMETT POV  
**

"I'm so sorry. I didn't realise that it would um… come to this, you know."

Edward growled.

"Now isn't the time for apologies, Emmett. Yes, you went and got her drunk while I was out hunting. Yes, you were a complete _idiot _by doing so. But right now, we have bigger problems on our hands. _Much _bigger problems."

"What's that supposed to mean? It's not like Jacob is going to hurt her or anything. The guy loves her!"

Edward sighed, and looked over at the door.

"How about I allow Quil to do the explaining? Come in, Quil."

I frowned. Quil? Wasn't he a…

"Werewolf," I groaned disappointedly. "Like that'll solve our problems."

The door opened and Quil walked in. I shuddered as the smell hit me. Was Edward out of his mind?

"There's not much time. She's…"

"Now that they know you've come to warn us, they'll speed up the process. Besides, there's no way any of us could go and save her. The treaty ensures that we must…"

"I know all about the treaty. I grew up with it," sighed Quil. "There was no way I could stop them. They're both bigger and stronger than I am, and…"

"I understand that. At least I know what to expect…"

I sighed in frustration.

"Hello! Frustrated vampire here! What's going on?" I demanded. Edward ignored me.

"Will he bring her home?" asked Edward.

"Probably. They were in human form, so I couldn't…"

"I know."

"This is getting…"

"Emmett, be quiet. No one cares."

That shut me up. Dude, what was with the whole angry face he had going?

"Well, Emmett, maybe if you hadn't gone and I don't know, _gotten her drunk_!, then perhaps I would be smiling. But, _no._"

I rolled my eyes. Where was Rosalie? She was always good in situations like these. No one else ever stuck up for me.

"Fight your own battles, Emmett. Now be quiet, I'm… oh my."

The door opened and Bella stumbled in. She looked sick, and was covered in spew. Edward raced to her side.

"Bella, are you okay?" he demanded. Bella groaned.

"Oh, my head. My back… my back. Oh my god! They… oh god."

"Bella, do you mind if I…?"

"Oh…" groaned Bella, she fell into Edward's arms. Edward carried her over to the lounge and lifted up the back of her shirt. I craned my neck to get a good look. There in the middle of her back, were two black letters inside a big red heart. _N.N. _

Edward growled.

"Can that be removed?" asked Quil. Edward sighed.

"No, it's permanent. It… I'm sorry, Bella. I never should have gotten you involved in this. I should just end this now."

I let out a low whistle.

"No, don't take the easy way out. We've got to get them back. We can't get to Jacob, and Nick is almost always on Quileute land. So that leaves…"

"Jessica," muttered Bella. "Get Jessica."

Edward still looked unsure.

"Perhaps if we…"

"Dude," laughed Quil. "You've got to admit, Emmett's got a good idea there. Get your revenge. Don't let Jacob, Newton and that Jessica win. _Fight back_. Even Bella agrees, don't you, Bella?"

"Of course," she mumbled.

I grinned at Quil to show my appreciation.

"So you're in?" I asked him. He laughed.

"Of course. This should be fun."

"Can we trust him?" I asked Edward. Edward looked over at Quil, frowning. His frown turned to a smile and he nodded.

"Yes, we can trust him."

**ROSALIE POV  
**

"We shouldn't make a move until we're agreed on a good prank. We can't let them off easy after everything they've done to us," said Emmett. I smiled.

Bella, who was still sick from yesterday's hangover, let out a laugh.

"You sound like we're planning their deaths, Emmett."

"If it were up to me," I interrupted, "we _would _be planning their…"

"EMMETT! WHAT HAVE I… OH GOD! EMMETT! GET IN HERE _NOW!_" came Carlisle's angry voice.

Emmett flinched. He went into Carlisle's office and paused at the doorway.

"Hey there, Carlisle."

"LOOK AT THIS! JUST _LOOK _AT THIS! I HAD SOME VERY IMPORTANT WORK ON THIS COMPUTER, EMMETT. NOW ALL OF THAT HAS BEEN REPLACED BY THOUSANDS OF PORN PICTURES!"

"Well they were just boring letters from random doctor people and I didn't think they mattered. I had to make space for all of those beautiful girls, and…"

I got up, and walked into the office.

"Carlisle, look. Get over it."

Carlisle frowned.

"Rosalie, I know you want to help Emmett get out of this situation, but…"

"Carlisle, you should be thanking Emmett."

Carlisle's eyes widened in horror.

"_Thanking _him?"

I smiled.

"Yes, because thanks to yours and Emmett's little dispute, I've had a brilliant idea to put those mongrels in their places once and for all."

"Great idea, Rosalie," laughed Edward. "But perhaps we should go a bit harder on them. After all, Bella's tattoo was very… major."

"Of course," I grinned. "Don't worry, that's not all we'll be doing to them. Once we're done with them, we'll never have any trouble from them ever again."

-

**Okay, well, there you go… Thanks for all the reviews, guys! It's great to know that you guys love the story. More chapters soon. (:**

x

-Bellapouts.


	16. Chapter 16

**CARLISLE POV**

Personally, I have no idea what the children could possibly hope to gain from this little 'prank war' of theirs they have going on at the moment. Every move they make seems to backfire on them. And yet, they do nothing to stop it.

Walking into my office, I scanned the room. Apart from an open jar of snails on the floor, everything seemed unusually normal. I sat in my computer chair and turned on the computer screen. Rosalie's naked form appeared on the screen, causing me to groan in frustration. Emmett already had his own computer. Why was it that he continued to use mine? Even after all the punishments I had given him, along with the children's help, it was quite clear that he still hadn't learnt his lesson.

Not that I approved of the children's pranking, I decided that maybe I wasn't being hard enough on Emmett, and that perhaps it was time for me to teach him what happens when you mess with Carlisle Cullen. Chuckling to myself, I made my way upstairs, and into Emmett and Rosalie's room. Ever since the prank war had started, the children were barely ever home. Esme was on holiday in Canada.

Having had no previous experience at pranking, I was unable to come up with something that would teach Emmett not to mess with me. It seemed unfair to do something that would affect Rosalie, as she had not crossed me lately, but surely she would understand my intentions.

In fact, everyone would probably be quite grateful that I had finally sorted out Emmett.

JACOB POV

I raised an eyebrow at Nick, who was peering through the curtains nervously. He had been watching the forest all day.

"Nick," I sighed, "come on, man. We can't sit here waiting for them to make their move. We need to get to them before they get to us."

Nick looked over at Jessica, who was looking gloomy, curled up in a ball on the sofa. It was obvious that she had no intention of pranking the Cullen's again.

"That Jason kid is outside," noted Nick, "standing behind a bush, looking upset."

I frowned.

"Jason?"

Jessica sighed, a sad smile forming on her lips.

"My stalker."

She didn't seem bothered by that. I had always thought of her as a strange person…

"Watch this," whispered Jessica, pointing over at the window.

Nick giggled stupidly to himself. Ignoring him, and trying not to think about how stupid he was, I glanced over at the window.

"I'm going to get dressed. Gee, I wonder where my pants are," yelled Jessica. Sure enough, a head appeared at the window. The sandy-haired, blue-eyed kid blushed upon noticing that we were all staring at him, and that Jessica was fully clothed.

An idea formed in my head.

"Hey kid, come inside. Jessica needs you to do a um… favor for her."

Jason's eyes filled with happiness, and he climbed through the open window. Nick and Jessica appeared puzzled. I winked at them. This was going to be pure genius!

They had taken over Quil, and made life hell for us. Payback would be sweet.

**BELLA POV  
**

"Bella, you need to stop listening to Edward so much. Now the guy won't even let you outside…"

"Emmett, stop trying to make Edward out to be a…"

"Shit!" cried Emmett, as he swerved to avoid a young boy standing in the middle of the road. The jeep collided with a tree and Emmett's strong hand kept me back in my seat.

We got out of the car and ran over to the little boy who was lying on the ground screaming and clutching his arm.

"Are you okay? Did I hit you?" gasped Emmett. The boy's eyes filled with tears.

"My… arm…" he moaned.

An old lady was frowning at us from across the street. I ignored her. Emmett picked the kid up in his arms.

"It's gonna be okay, kid. I'm Emmett, and this is Bella. We're going to take you to the hospital."

-

We took a cab to the hospital and rushed Nick inside. We handed him over to the doctors, and all we could do was sit in the waiting room.

Emmett looked really upset with himself.

"Oh god, I hope the poor kid makes it," he groaned. I smiled slightly.

"Emmett, he's just hurt his arm, that's all. It's not like he's on his deathbed or anything."

Emmett sighed, unconvinced.

"Rose is going to kill me. Rose is going to kill me."

I laughed.

"You'll be right."

The little kid rounded the corner, his arm in a sling, a grumpy look on his face. Emmett and I raced over to him.

"Are you okay?" demanded Emmett. The kid sighed. He looked like he was only twelve, perhaps younger.

"My arm really hurts. They x-rayed me. Apparently, they can't find anything wrong with it. But it really hurts, so they put it in a sling."

Emmett sighed in relief.

"Can we drop you home?" he asked the kid. The kid sighed, and his grumpy look returned.

"My parents aren't home. They've um… gone out for the day. I've got nowhere to go," he explained. Emmett grinned.

"That's okay, you can hang with us for the day. It's the least I can do. Really, I didn't mean to hit you. I got distracted," he suggested.

The kid grinned.

"Sure! Well, I'm Jason."

**ROSE POV**

After another of Emmett's little porn incidents on Carlisle's computer, I had finally come up with something that would hopefully get the mongrels in BIG trouble. But of course, Nick and Jacob were almost always on Quileute land. Which left…

Jessica.

I snuck around the back of her house, holding a disk that I had got Emmett to put together earlier this morning. No one was home. The perfect time to get even with her, as I was sure she had been in on the whole 'tattooing Bella' ordeal.

I climbed through her open bedroom window. They had told me that she was stupid, but obviously she was stupider than we all thought, if she decided to leave her window open during a prank war.

Her room was quite large. Almost everything was pink. The walls, her bedspread, the carpet, her phone, her laptop…

She had even been stupid enough to leave her cell here! I picked it up and began texting her father. It was his birthday today. His day would be ruined when he got home and saw what was on Jessica's computer. Poor guy. But it had to be done!

_Daddy, _

_Happy birthday! When you get home, I've left a present for you on your laptop. You're going to love it! I love you!  
Love Jessica. _

I hit the send button, and put her cell back where I had found it. Grinning to myself, I crept out of her bedroom and down a long hallway. Finally, I located her parent's bedroom. Her father's laptop was sitting on his bedside table. I turned it on and put my disk into the side slot.

I deleted all of his files, and download the disc's contents onto his laptop. Grinning to myself, when thousands upon thousands of pictures and videos of naked men and women appeared on his screen, I pulled my disk out, and left the room.

While I was here, maybe I could trash Jessica's clothes as well. Her father would be so angry at her over the porn ordeal, that he wouldn't give her any money to get new clothes. Hopefully this would be enough to get her to back off. Maybe Jacob and Nick would get the message, too.

Running back into her room, I opened up her wardrobe and ripped all of her clothes into shreds, leaving only a worn-out old brown tracksuit in good condition.

**JASON POV**

The Cullen's had a massive house. Surely they were millionaires. Maybe they had won _Who Wants To Be A Millionaire_? That show is so cool!

Bella and Emmett were sitting on the lounge watching TV. Nick and Jacob had been right! She was pretty. But not as good-looking as Jessica, of course! I sighed happily. Jessica…

Bella let out a scream.

"Oh my god, Emmett! Turn it off! It's too scary!" she yelled, blocking her view of the TV. Emmett raised an eyebrow.

"Dora The Explorer scares you?" laughed Emmett.

"Why are you guys watching Dora?" I gasped, blocking my view of the TV. "That show's like R rated!"

Emmett sighed to himself.

"Am I the only sane one here? It's a cartoon fox chasing her! It's not gonna eat her or anything! You guys are idiots. This is just a normal baby cartoon!"

"Which explains why you watch it, little boy," I muttered, hoping he wouldn't hear.

"What was that?" asked Emmett. Bella pouted.

"Nothing, Emmett. Just change the channel, please. I can't bear to watch it. Oh god, the fox has found her!"

Leaving Bella and Emmett to argue, I turned and ascended the stairs. The house was so fancy. These guys were living in luxury. None of the bedrooms had beds in them. How strange.

**BPOV**

"Seriously, Emmett! What's with the children's shows?" I groaned, as Emmett flicked to yet another boring kids show.

Emmett grinned.

"They can't be that bad if Jason and I like them," he laughed. I looked around, wanting to ask Jason what he thought. But he was gone…

"Speaking of Jason, have you got any idea where he is?"

The front door burst open and Edward, Jasper and Rosalie walked in, laughing.

"Such a brilliant plan," laughed Edward. Emmett and I exchanged a glance. So much for keeping Emmett's crash with Jason a secret. Sometimes Edward's mind-reading skills became really annoying. Edward's smile fell, and his eyes landed on Emmett.

"Well while we were out, Emmett managed to hit a young boy called Jason, who just happens to be Jessica's stalker. Emmett felt bad for the kid, so he decided to bring him back here. Now Emmett has no idea where he is, and he's not in the house."

I gasped in shock.

"That kid was Jessica's stalker? You've got to be kidding me!" I groaned. Emmett's face fell.

"Why is it so bad? The kid knows Jessica. Big deal."

"What do you think the chances are of this whole thing being organized by Jacob and Nick?" groaned Jasper.

That would be a good plan on Jacob and Nick's part. Emmett probably never even hit Jason. Jacob, Nick and perhaps even Jessica would have been in on this. Get Jason to pretend to get hit by Emmett, then get him to pretend that his parents were out, then come back here, sneak off and…

"What do you think he's done?" I asked Edward. "Jasper's right. This whole thing was probably a stupid plan of the mongrels."

"It's not a stupid plan, Bella," noted Rosalie. "Actually, I'm surprised that the idiots had the brains to think up such a clever plan."

"Yes, but now," interrupted Jasper, "we must ask ourselves if it's safe to go upstairs."

Everyone looked over at me.

"Okay, so you tough, strong, invincible vampires want a poor little delicate human like me to go up there and face whatever that kid's done?"

They all laughed. I sighed, and went upstairs. I walked through Emmett and Rosalie's ajar bedroom door, and glanced around their room. Everything seemed fine.

Edward appeared behind me, making me jump.

"I've checked all the rooms. Maybe this wasn't a cleverly thought out plan by the mongrels. Maybe Emmett really _did _hit Jason."

We went back downstairs, puzzled. If the mongrels hadn't planned the whole thing, then why had Jason disappeared?

**JESSICA POV**

I walked through the front door, smiling to myself. Jason would have done what we had planned by now, and the Cullen's would be totally unaware of what we had done!

My father was stretched out across the lounge looking grumpy, a beer in his hand.

"Happy birthday, daddy!" I greeted, bending down and kissing him on the cheek. He got to his feet, looking angry.

"What have you got to say for yourself?" he demanded. My mother walked into the room and scowled at me. She put an arm around Dad.

"Stay calm, honey. It's okay. I've thought of a suitable punishment for her," said my mother.

"What are you talking about, Mom?" I demanded. My father scowled.

"You went onto my computer, deleted all of my files, and now the computer's full of porn and viruses. It's not a pleasant thing to face that on your birthday."

"Daddy, what are you talking about? I would never do anything like that!" I cried, tears filling my eyes. No doubt the Cullen's were somehow involved in this.

My mother sighed and raised an eyebrow. There was no point trying to defend myself by explaining the prank war to them, and blaming it all on the Cullen's. They wouldn't believe me. They would just think that I was making up stupid excuses.

"Look, lying won't get you anywhere in life, Jessica. We _know _you did it. No one else has been in here today. You even sent your father a text message telling him to check his computer when he got home!" she exclaimed.

I gasped. The Cullen's had even managed to send a text message to my father that would make it look like _I _was behind it all! Why had I even agreed to take part in this stupid 'prank war'? But after everything that had happened, there was no turning back. They'd keep pranking me, and I wouldn't be able to get my revenge without the help of Jacob and Nick. I needed to stick with them, continuing to plot against the Cullen's. After all, it would all be over soon. Both sides were getting sick of it.

"You can choose not to believe me," I sighed, looking out the window at a group of kids laughing across the street. They wouldn't have to worry about stupid prank wars.

"Already done," grunted my father. "I can't believe you would do something like this. There's nothing I want to say to you."

Tears filled my eyes as he turned and left the room, leaving my mother to deal with me. It was his birthday, and the Cullen's had ruined his day. The worst part was that he was convinced that it was I who caused the damage.

"No tantrums, Jessica, but I have confiscated your phone, your laptop, your iPod, all of your electronics. You won't be getting your allowance anymore, after what you've done. Go to your room. I can't believe you would do this to your father. Did you see how upset he looked?"

No allowance? No electronics? What was I going to do? I walked down the hallway and into my room. I closed the door behind me and opened my wardrobe, looking for a sweater.

I screamed at the top of my lungs. My clothes! My beautiful clothes! They had all been torn to shreds, leaving only an old brown tracksuit that looked as if it was from the eighteenth century. What was I going to wear to school? My parents weren't even giving me an allowance anymore, and I had stupidly spent all of my money at the mall with Lauren…

The Cullen's would pay.

-

**I'm keen for the release of Eclipse. (: Thanks for sticking with me, guys. The reviews are great. Thank you to everyone who reviews me. (:**

x

Bellapouts. 


	17. Chapter 17

**BPOV**

As Charlie was away with Billy for a few days, I was staying with the Cullen's. I awoke to the sound of screams. Jumping out of bed, I ran into the hallway. Rosalie emerged from her bedroom, screaming.

"My wardrobe's full of snails!" she screamed, running down the stairs. I went into her bedroom and opened her wardrobe doors. All of her and Emmett's clothes were covered in snails. No wonder she was panicking.

"CARLISLE! WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT TO ME?"

Giggling, I raced downstairs to watch the confrontation between Carlisle and Rosalie.

"Rosalie, I'm sorry. I was trying to get back at Emmett for continuously watching porn on my computer…"

Emmett burst out laughing.

"So putting snails in my wardrobe is your idea of a revenge prank? Ha! Pathetic! I could do better with my eyes closed!" he laughed.

The door opened and Esme strode in, smiling.

"Hey kids, I'm back!" she greeted. Her face fell when she saw the look of horror on Rosalie's face.

"Don't tell me. Jacob and Nick pranked you, did they?" guessed Esme. Rosalie pointed a finger in Carlisle's direction.

"Worse! Your _husband _filled my wardrobe with snails!" she exclaimed. Esme raised an eyebrow, before laughing and shaking her head to herself.

"Carlisle, I have to admit, couldn't you be a bit more original? The whole snail thing keeps getting repeated!" laughed Esme.

Alice and Jasper appeared, looking angry.

"You guys have _got _to come and see this! It's terrible! Now I know what that stupid little Jason kid did when he came in here!" cried Alice. Esme looked puzzled.

"Care to fill me in?" she asked me.

"Jason is Jessica's stalker. She sent him to us undercover, and he came inside and snuck of for a while. Eventually, he disappeared. We didn't know where he'd gone. Obviously, he's pranked us somehow."

I turned and followed Alice and Jasper into their bedroom. Everyone stood around Alice's laptop. Emmett's face appeared on the screen.

"_The Cullen's – part one!" he smirked. The camera showed a door that I recognized to be the Cullen's toilet door. My voice filled my ears, singing Mary had a little lamb. _

"_That's Bella, singing on the toilet," Emmett told the camera.  
_

_Carlisle filled the screen. He was sitting in his office, looking at his computer screen, unaware that he was being filmed.  
_

"_Oh god!" he whimpered. "Alice and Jasper are getting it on upstairs, and Alice forgot to turn off her web cam!"_

_A view of Edward's bathroom appeared on the screen. Edward was standing in front of the mirror, doing his hair. He frowned, clearly annoyed.  
_

"_Damn," he muttered to himself. "I ran out of hair gel!"_

Emmett's booming laugh sounded, and it dawned on Edward that Emmett was filming him. 

"_Get out!" yelled Edward, pushing Emmett out of the bathroom._

The scene changed. Jasper was standing in Emmett and Rosalie's room. He picked up a magazine off of the bed.  


"_A porn mag," he sighed to himself, shaking his head. He looked around, making sure that no one was looking.  
_

"_Guess it wouldn't hurt to have a peek," he muttered under his breath, opening the magazine to the first page. _

"_Caught in the act!" yelled Emmett. Jasper jumped, throwing the magazine out the window. His face turned red.  
_

"_Turn that camera off!" he growled, striding past Emmett and out of the room. _

_The scene changed. Rosalie and Alice were sitting on the lounge watching a documentary on celebrities.  
_

"_Oh, wow! Cameron Diaz uses the same shampoo as me!" beamed Alice. Rosalie snorted.  
_

"_Are you kidding me? Her hair looks hideous!" she laughed. Alice glared at her.  
_

"_At least I use shampoo!" she yelled. Rosalie turned bright red.  
_

"_I wash my beautiful hair every night. Just in case you were wondering, I use the same shampoo as Justin Bieber!"_

_Alice burst out laughing. _

"_Yeah, well that explains a lot."  
_

_Rosalie pushed Alice off of the lounge. _

Alice closed her laptop, sighing.

"That's the end. Rosalie and I get into a bit of a fight there, but you get the point."

Rosalie looked as if she was on the verge of tears. She turned to Emmett, glaring.

"Why would you do this to me?" she demanded, placing her hands on her hips.

"It wasn't me!" exclaimed Emmett, pouting. Rosalie looked over at Edward, to see if Emmett was telling the truth. Edward nodded.

"Emmett is telling the truth. He filmed all of this, and put the tape in the bottom of his wardrobe. I don't think he realized that Jason was going to come along and take it."

It dawned on me that we weren't the only ones watching the video.

"Jason put it on youtube!" I gasped. Alice nodded.

"It's already got nine hundred thousand views, and it's only been on there for a day!" she whimpered. "It's horrible!"

"I bet Jacob, Jessica and Nick are behind this!" pointed out Rosalie. "But at least I pulled that brilliant prank on Jessica."

The whole town had probably seen this by now. We would all be the laughing stock of the school.

"I feel really sick!" sighed Alice. "I don't think I can go to school today."

Emmett snorted.

"You crazy vampire! If we don't go to school, everyone will think we're too embarrassed! We need to show them that we don't care!" he said calmly.

"But we _do _care," pointed out Jasper.

"Let's just go to school and face the music," argued Emmett.

"Agreed," I muttered.

School wasn't as bad as we had thought it would be. Obviously, most people had seen the video of us that Jason had put on youtube, and whispers and laughs echoed in my ears. Nevertheless, all it took to shut them up was a glare from Rosalie.

I had to admit, the video was quite funny. Apart from the whole thing about me singing on the toilet…

**Jessica POV**

I tried pretending to be sick, but my mother knew I was faking. She forced me to come to school. After the Cullen's had ruined all of my clothes except for an old, brown tracksuit that looked absolutely hideous, and after they had downloaded porn onto my father's computer and given me the blame, my father wouldn't give me any money to buy new clothes.

It was _utterly _horrible. Walking into school wearing a dirty old brown tracksuit that hadn't been washed for three years!

I walked up to Lauren, who was wearing beautiful, clean-smelling clothes and babbling to Angela.

"Hey Lauren!" I greeted. Lauren continued talking to Angela, ignoring me.

"Um, Lauren," interrupted Angela, "Jessica is talking to you."

Lauren looked down at me, wrinkling her nose.

"Oh my god, Jess. I didn't recognize you. Why are you wearing that old potato sack? Oh, and why do you smell so bad? Your hair looks like it hasn't been washed in days! Feral!"

"Well, my parents wouldn't let me take a shower, cause they're really angry at me at the moment, and the Cullen's destroyed all of my clothes," I explained, hoping that she would understand. Lauren took a step away from me.

"Don't talk to me. You'll ruin my reputation," she snarled, turning her back and strutting towards a group of nearby boys, who were giving me weird looks. I moved closer to Angela, who backed away, holding her nose.

"Angela, come on. It's not that bad," I sighed desperately. Angela just shook her head, walking over to Ben and Tyler.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw the Cullen's walk past, laughing to themselves and pointing at me.

"Nice work, Rose," I heard Emmett laugh. I clenched a fist. So _Rosalie _was behind this, was she?

In Italian, the only class I had with Rosalie, the teacher put a video on and made us sit quietly. Rosalie was texting under the table.

"Sir," I said, raising my hand. "It's hard to concentrate on the movie with Rosalie texting over there."

The teacher raised an eyebrow.

"Ms. Stanley, have you ever heard of a little thing I like to call deodorant? Now do be quiet, and watch the movie."

Blushing a deep shade of red, I ignored the laughter that erupted around the classroom and pulled out my notebook.

**ROSALIE POV**

_She's trying 2 get me in trouble with the teacher._

**Lol Rose. Nice work on the pranking.**

_I miss u Emmy. Xx_

**Bella just fell off her chair!**

_That's not funny. _

**Yeah it is. Mike is the only 1 not laughing. **

_Jessica looks like she wants to kill me. _

**Lol.**

_I think she knows it was me that pranked her. _

**Yeah, every1 is avoiding her cuz she smells. **

_If only we could get to Nick and Jacob. _

**I'm working on it, Rosie. **

I stopped texting and looked up to see the teacher looking down at me.

"Are you behind this?" he demanded, handing me a paper aeroplane made out of pink paper. I unfolded it and read the message on it.

_This class is boring. The teacher is an idiot, love Rose. =]_

"No, sir," I replied, handing the aeroplane back to him. The teacher glared at me.

"I was under the impression that you were the only Rose in this class. These little aeroplanes of yours are all around the room! Detention."

Glaring over at Jessica, who was smirking at me, I clenched my fist. As the teacher walked away, I whipped out my phone.

_Bad news, Emmy. Jessica's got me on detention today._

**Damn. I wanted to talk tactics with you.**

_Tactics?_

**Pranking ideas.**

_Oh, right… _

**BPOV  
**

For some incredibly strange reason, Emmett had decided to take Trigonometry. He had taken up residence in the empty seat beside me, as Jessica had left Trigonometry and was now doing Italian.

"Apparently Jessica is trying to get Rose in trouble with their Italian teacher," Emmett muttered to me. I frowned at him.

Mike turned around in his seat to join the conversation.

"Jessica's been acting really weird lately. By the looks of it, she hasn't had a shower in days."

Emmett and I exchanged a mischievous glance. Mike raised an eyebrow.

"You guys aren't still going on with all of that pranking crap, are you?" he sighed. Emmett beamed at him.

"We sure are!"

Mike laughed.

"Nick's been acting so strange lately. He sits by the window looking out at our yard all day long. It's so freaky. Whatever you guys have been doing sure seems to be taking its toll on him. Jacob Black's staying at our place tonight cause his dad's gone away with your dad or something, Bella."

Emmett grinned.

"Mike, I advise you to stay out of the house tonight."

Mike sighed. Emmett's eyes narrowed.

"Unless, of course, you wish to spend some time with Jacob and Nick."

Mike laughed.

"Emmett, I'd rather be on your side than theirs. Seriously, Jacob's a cool guy. But Jessica and Nick are idiots. I can't believe I dated Jessica. What was I thinking?"

"You weren't," I muttered. Mike smiled.

"So what was with that video you guys put up on youtube of yourselves? Pretty embarrassing, if you ask me."

Emmett beamed.

"It wasn't us. It was Jessica's stalker, Jason. He stole the video from us," I explained to Mike.

"Are you serious? That little kid that follows Jessica like some sort of dog?"

I giggled, leaning back in my chair. My chair toppled over and I found myself sprawled across the ground. The whole class burst into laughter. It bothered me that Emmett's face was turning red in laughter. Mike was the only one not laughing. He got out of his chair and helped me to my feet.

"Sorry, sir," I muttered, receiving a dirty look from Mr. Byron.

Emmett leaned in to Mike and me.

"Mike, welcome to the world of pranking. Let's discuss our pranking methods."

**Edward POV**

Sometimes Emmett could be a very stupid person. Why the hell had he even filmed that stupid video in the first place? Thoughts had flooded my mind all day of what people were thinking about it.

_Oh, wow! So that's why Edward's hair looks so good! He uses loads of gel!  
_

_Wow, Alice uses the same shampoo as Cameron Diaz? No wonder her hair glows!_

Whoa, that moody Jasper kid reads porn mags, huh? 

_Edward is such a fag. _

_That's so sick. Jasper and Alice doing it and forgetting to turn off their webcam, ha! And their dad saw what they were doing? Wow. _

_That Rosalie chick sure can get feisty… _

**Jacob POV**

Jason had done just what we had wanted him to do! He had put that embarrassing video up of the Cullen's, and it had just reached one million views after being on youtube for a day!

"I hope the Cullen's don't find out that I'm staying at Nick's tonight," I muttered to myself. "That would lead to complete chaos."

"But Bella is so beautiful, and I haven't seen her gorgeous face in such a long time. It saddens me," sighed Nick. I rolled my eyes.

"You sadden me," I muttered.

"What was that?"

"Oh, nothing."

-

**This chapter was a bit longer than my others, but I haven't updated in a while, so I guess it's a good thing. Keep those reviews coming, guys. I love to hear your opinions. (:**

x

**-Bellapouts. **


	18. Chapter 18

BELLA POV

Emmett and I had to wait until Rosalie's detention was over. Now we had yet another reason to prank those idiots. Jessica had gotten Rose on detention. The list was endless. There was no way any of us were going to come out of this completely sane. I was beginning to wonder what we were thinking when we got ourselves into this mess…

"Okay, so Jacob and Nick are having a sleepover at Nick's tonight."

Emmett was explaining what we needed to do to Mike, who had somehow joined us today to prank his own _brother_. Honestly, what was the world coming to?

"For the tenth time, Emmett. We know that they're having a sleepover tonight, alright?" sighed Mike. I laughed.

"Exactly," sighed Emmett in frustration. "Which is what I'm trying to get through your thick skull! This is the perfect pranking opportunity for us! Those idiots aren't going to prank us tonight. So basically, we can do whatever we want to them."

"Aren't sleepovers for girls?"

We all looked around to see Rosalie, looking grumpier than normal. Emmett embraced her in a bear hug.

"So I'm guessing that detention didn't go so well?" I grinned. Rosalie sighed frustratedly.

"Oh, the detention was fine. It's the fact that the reason I was there was Jessica's stupidity," sighed Rosalie. She seemed to realise that Mike was standing with us. She wrinkled her nose in disgust.

"One Newton is enough to prank," she growled, raising her finger at Mike. Emmett stood between them, a big grin on his face.

"Chill out, Rosie. Mike's doing us a huge favor by joining us and ratting out on his own _brother_!" he explained, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Rosalie just shook her head.

"I don't care who he is, and what he's doing to us. I don't trust him. He's a _Newton_, for crying out loud!" she sighed, throwing her arms up into the air.

Mike looked upset at this. It was embarrassing to admit that I was actually feeling sorry for a Newton.

"Just give the kid a chance!" I exclaimed. Emmett turned around and glared at me. He raised a hand.

"Bella, this isn't your field of expertise. I'm the only one who can deal with Rosalie, all right? Good, I'm glad we understand each other."

I pouted. If he thought I acted like him, then wouldn't I be able to deal with her as well?

Emmett turned to Rosalie.

"Okay, babe. I know he's a Newton. But he's on our side, I'm sure of it. Just trust me on this one."

Rosalie smiled and held up her new cream-coloured handbag. Emmett raised an eyebrow.

"Sure, on one condition."

Emmett groaned.

"There's always conditions!"

Rosalie laughed and handed him her bag.

"I bought this yesterday at the mall with Alice. Your job is to go to the mall and buy the exact same bag in black. Cream just doesn't suit me…"

Emmett grinned.

"Sounds easy enough. Where did you buy it at?"

Rosalie giggled.

"Funny thing is that I can't quite remember."

Mike groaned and went and stood in front of Rosalie. He took the bag from Emmett, and thrust it at Rosalie. Rosalie glared at him, looking as if she could kill him.

"Look, get over it. Whether you like me or not, I'm on your side now. Get your handbag yourself."

Emmett laughed.

"Wow, Mike. Didn't know you had that sort of anger in you!"

Mike smiled.

"I guess watching my _How to be a real man _DVD paid off!"

**Jacob POV**

Out of all the stupid things I had ever done, this was definitely the worst. There was a very slim chance that the Cullen's might not know that I was on their territory, staying at Nick's house on the weekend his parents were away, but it was unlikely.

For bloodsuckers, the Cullen's were actually pretty smart. If they were as smart as I thought they were, they would be watching every move that Nick, Jessica and I make. If that was the case, then Nick and I were doomed. Of course the stupid bloodsuckers would have something up their sleeve.

It's hard to be optimistic when the bloodsuckers are involved. Bloodsuckers plus Jacob Black equals negativity.

It's pretty obvious that Nick hasn't had much experience with the Cullen's. He seems to think that they're not going to have any idea about tonight's sleepover. I'm beginning to wonder why I ever teamed up with that kid…

But there's no turning back now! This is _war_.

**Nick POV  
**

I opened the front door and saw Jacob looking gloomy, standing on the front doorstep in a pair of shorts. He pushed past me and slammed the door behind him.

"What's up with you?" I asked, knowing full well that he thought we were going to get ambushed by the Cullen's tonight.

Jacob collapsed on the lounge and flicked the TV on, ignoring my question. I peered out through a chink in the curtains, looking for any signs of the Cullen's. There was no one outside, and no familiar cars. Why was Jacob panicking over nothing? They probably didn't even know that we were here tonight.

Jacob was watching some sort of tiger documentary on the Discovery Channel.

"Jacob, can you put Cartoon Network on? I think there's a good cartoon coming on right about now."

Jacob turned around and glared at me.

"Look, Nick. You're not funny! Why don't you have a bomb shelter? How else are we going to hide from those bl- I mean, the Cullen's, if there's no bomb shelter here?"

Jacob always said that I needed to think logically more often. Well, he was the one who wanted to watch stupid tiger documentaries and hide in bomb shelters from people who don't even know where we are! We should be watching cartoons and giving each other facials. It's much more manly than sitting in bomb shelters playing cards!

"They aren't coming, alright? They're all so dumb! I bet they watch the news every single night! Don't they realise how many sponge bob episodes are on during all of those stupid news programs? They must be crazy if they think they can afford to miss sponge bob."

Jacob sighed, and rolled his eyes at me.

"Dude, you're so weird. Everyone watches the news. The news is informative. My dad watches the news, for crying out loud! He's actually kind of smart, I guess. As for sponge bob, that was my favourite show when I was four."

He turned around and faced the TV. Tears welled up in my eyes. I didn't know what he had meant when he just said whatever that was, but it was obviously something mean and hurtful.

I went outside and examined the street one last time. No sign of any Cullen cars. Jacob was just being an idiot. They weren't coming tonight.

The sun was setting in the distance. Once I had claimed Bella for myself, I could walk her up the hill every night to watch the sunset, seeing as my parents had sold my car to pay for all the damages the Cullen's had caused and blamed on me.

Bella loved me. I knew it. Edward drugged her all the time, but she still knew in her heart that if she had the strength to get away from Edward she would, and come and live with me in the spare room of my grandma's house, seeing as my parents didn't like Bella very much.

It wouldn't be long now. Bella would be mine soon. I wouldn't have to wait much longer. That stupid drug dealer Edward and his stupid family were going DOWN.

Snapping out of my lustful thoughts of Bella, I went over to the letterbox to get the mail. There were no love letters from Bella, only a colourful piece of paper.

I screamed in delight, bouncing up and down. Jacob came running out of the house, looking scared.

"I knew they were coming! Quick, get inside before they get you!" he cried. I ran up to him and showed him the piece of paper.

"It's a voucher for Wal Mart," sighed Jacob. "_That's _what you were screaming about?"

"Ten dollars!" I grinned. "That's a lot of money, isn't it? We should go and spend it! I can buy condoms for Bella!"

Jacob sighed.

"Whatever. Let's make it quick, though. I want to see the end of that tiger documentary."

**Bella POV  
**

"Bella, stay still. I'm messing up your war paint," growled Alice. I shuddered as the cold, green slime made contact with my face. Edward, Jasper, Alice, Rosalie, Emmett and Mike looked very strange in their camouflage jumpsuits and war paint.

I sighed, knowing that I probably looked just as stupid as they did.

"No one's going to see us, Emmett. What's the point of war paint and jumpsuits?" demanded Mike. Emmett shrugged, and looked through his binoculars.

The eight of us were crouched behind bushes, waiting for Nick and Jacob to fall for our trap.

"Nick has taken the bait!" he whispered, just as Alice had finished putting my war paint on.

Edward crawled over to where I crouched, and chuckled softly when he saw me. I blushed.

"Bella, you look nice in war paint. You should wear it more often," he noted. Jasper laughed, and patted Edward on the back.

"Edward, that's the corniest thing you've ever said," he laughed. Mike gasped in amazement at Jasper's words.

"Wow, Jasper. That's a lot of anger you're showing there. Have you been watching the _How to be a real man_

DVD, too? It really helps you out loads, doesn't it?"

There I had been thinking that Mike was actually somewhat normal…

Emmett leapt to his feet.

"Let's go," he ordered, holding up a green water pistol and running along the ground in a crouched position towards Nick's house.

I got to my feet and ran after him.

"Now, Bella," said Emmett, trying very hard to keep a straight face. "Stay calm. We might not come out of this alive, and if we don't, then I'm glad that I was able to teach you how to be a rebel."

"Bella's as much a rebel as I am a saint," laughed Jasper, squirting Emmett with his water gun. Emmett stopped running and grabbed Jasper by the shirt.

"This isn't funny. We're here to do a job. Bella _is _a rebel, and this whole thing was _her_ idea. The best part is that _I'm _her mentor. Now stop wasting your water, and let's go and do this thing," he growled.

We reached the house. There was no one in the street, so we didn't have to worry too much about being seen. Emmett was having a ball. He was taking the whole thing seriously, acting as if he were a real army commander.

"Now, we don't have long before the enemy realizes that the voucher is a fake and return home," began Emmett, before being cut off by Jasper squirting him in the face with his water gun. Emmett held up a fist to Jasper, but Alice stood in front of him, blocking Jasper from harm.

"Don't _ever_ interrupt my army speech, dude," growled Emmett.

"Get to the point," groaned Rosalie.

"Well, now this is the battlefield," said Emmett, grabbing a stick and drawing a map of the house in the dirt. "We have the perfect means of…"

"Go, go, go!" cried Jasper, signaling for everyone to move in. Emmett tackled him to the ground.

"Don't… interrupt… my… army… speech! I'm… the… commander… not… you!" yelled Emmett, slapping Jasper between every word. Jasper pushed Emmett off of him and got to his feet, brushing dirt off of his jumpsuit.

"What are you, a _girl_? Be a real man and _punch_. _Slapping _is for wimps. Maybe _you _should watch that video of Mike's, _How to be a real man_."

Rosalie went over and punched Jasper square in the face. Jasper didn't flinch. Being a vampire paid off.

"There? You happy? You got punched. Now let's do this, and stop wasting _time_!"

She turned and ran up the front steps, where Edward, Alice and Mike were waiting for us.

"Good thing you've got a _girl _to do the fighting for you," muttered Jasper.

**-**

Well it took me a while, but here's the next chapter. For some reason I keep getting Mike and Nick mixed up, which is really starting to annoy me. Review your feedback. What the Cullen's do to Nick and Jacob will be in the next chapter. Stay tuned, folks. (:

-Bellapouts


	19. Chapter 19

**Nick POV**

Jacob and I arrived at Wal Mart with the ten-dollar voucher we had received in the mail. It wasn't often that you got the chance to have so much money in your hands!

Jacob wasn't as keen as I was. He still seemed to think that the Cullen's were going to prank us during our sleepover, but what did he know? I mean, he wasn't exactly _sane_.

We walked into Wal Mart and my eyes lit up in glee.

"This is great, I'm going to go buy some con…"

"No, you aren't," interrupted Jacob. "We're going to get some Doritos or something. Let's go."

I sighed and decided not to push him further. Jacob went over to the food area and scanned the shelves. He grabbed a few packets of Doritos and walked over to the toy section. I frowned. There was no way we were buying toys!

"Do you remember these?" asked Jacob, holding up a Barbie. "Forgot they even existed. I used to have a ball with them when I was a kid."

My eyes popped out of my head and I ran over to him and snatched the Barbie from his hands.

"Dude, Barbie's are legend!" I gasped, flattening its blonde hair. "Do you think Bella might like them? She plays with dolls, I think."

Jacob picked up another Barbie doll and looked at the price tag.

"It's a little dearer than ten dollars, mate. I'm broke at the moment."

That was a shame, as I knew that Bella would just _love _a Barbie doll. Heck, I might even want one myself! My other dolls were a little worn out.

"Let's just get the Doritos, then," I sighed, tossing the Barbie back onto the shelf. We walked over to the cash register and allowed the woman to scan the corn chips.

"That'll be nine eighty-five," she told us, holding out her hand. Jacob handed her the ten-dollar voucher we had received in the voucher. The lady frowned and shook her head. She handed it back to Jacob.

"Is something wrong here?" asked her manager, a tall, balding man who had just arrived.

"They tried to give me a fake voucher," she told him. He frowned and turned to us.

Jacob swore loudly, which got a nasty look from the manager guy.

"Get out now, or I'll be forced to call security," he said firmly, pointing at the door. Jacob gasped.

"What are you talking about? You guys sent us that voucher in the mail, didn't you? Why the hell would you send us fake vouchers?"

"We haven't seen out any vouchers, idiot. Out! Now!"

Jacob grabbed my wrist and dragged me over to the automatic doors. He tossed the voucher into the bin and dragged me over to the car.

"That was weird," I sighed, sitting in the passenger seat of Jacob's Rabbit. Jacob took up the driver's seat and gave me a weird look.

"Don't you see? The Cullen's must have pranked us! We can't go back to your place… they might be waiting for us."

Jacob was an idiot. As if the Cullen's had known about our sleepover!

"Where do you suggest we go then?" I demanded. Jacob shrugged and started the car.

"Let's go visit Quil or something."

**Bella POV  
**

"Why are they taking so long?" demanded Rosalie.

We were all crouched in the Newton living room in darkness, hiding behind furniture, holding our water guns, with war paint smeared over our faces.

"I wish Alice hadn't chickened out and decided to go shopping," sighed Emmett. "We might actually know what was going on with them if she was here."

"Okay team," said Jasper. "Just hang in there. They'll be here soon. They're probably in the process of chucking a tantrum in Wal Mart, having realized that their 'voucher' is a fake."

Emmett growled and grabbed Jasper by the shirt.

"Dude, how many times? _I'm _the leader, not you. Don't make comments that I should be making, understood?"

Edward rolled his eyes, and I giggled.

"Cut it out, Emmett. We've got more important stuff to deal with, in case you had forgotten. Leave Jasper alone."

Emmett snorted and dropped Jasper. He turned to Edward.

"Excuse me? 'Leave Jasper alone'? What are you, _Alice_?"

There was a knock on the door. Everyone went silent. It was Edward who broke the silence.

"It's not…" he began, but was cut off by Emmett's squeal of delight. He was pushed out of the way by Jasper, who raced over to the door.

Emmett pulled him down by the ankle and pulled on the doorknob. Jasper and Emmett began firing their water pistols.

"… Them," muttered Edward.

Jasper and Emmett stopped firing and stood motionless in the doorframe. In front of them, was a postman who was drenched, and looked as if he wanted to knock them both out.

"Oh, I'm um… sorry," muttered Emmett. Jasper knocked him into the wall, leaving a big hole in the wall.

"I'm very sorry, sir," sighed Jasper. "It's this little boy here, Emmett. He's erm… not normal. Seeing as he doesn't have very much fun in his life, my sister was going to come home and let Emmett spray her with water. It might make him laugh, you see. All we get out of him are grunts and clogged toilets, and I'm very sorry about getting your clothes wet. We thought you were my sister, you see. He's had _special _problems throughout his life. It's been tough for him."

The postman sighed and held up a box.

"You Mr. Nick Newton?" he asked. I giggled into Edward's shoulder as Jasper nodded and signed for the parcel. The postman raised an eyebrow at Emmett, who was lying on the ground in pain, moaning, grunting and whimpering.

The postman handed the box to Jasper and ran down the steps and got back in his van. Jasper slammed the door shut and collapsed on the ground in laughter.

"Jasper, you _idiot_!" groaned Emmett, as he got to his feet. "Telling him I wasn't… normal."

Jasper smiled and ripped open the box. He held up a handful of pink bras, pink panties and a pink dress.

"Why does Nick want this sort of stuff?" he asked, shuddering as he threw the bras, panties and dress back into the box.

We all went upstairs into Nick's room and looked in his wardrobe. Sure enough, there was a whole load of dresses and lingerie.

"This is so weird. Check out his diary," gasped Emmett, handing it to me. In it, were around a dozen photos of Nick. One photo was of him wearing skimpy lingerie that didn't cover his… and it looked as if he had stuffed the bra.

Another was of Nick wearing a skimpy red dress and holding a red handbag with red lipstick and eye shadow smeared across his face.

I handed the diary and the photos to Edward, not wanting a further look at them.

"This is great," laughed Rosalie, looking over Edward's shoulder. "How about we send these into the school newspaper?"

"We could make fliers," I suggested. "You know, and put them up all over town. The whole town would know about his cross-dressing, then."

Emmett grinned admiringly at me.

"You're turning into such a rebel, Bella. It's great! We can put the photos online as well, can't we? Nick's going to be so embarrassed!"

"It's a better prank than ambushing Nick and Jacob with our water pistols. We need fresh pranking ideas. This is good," noted Rosalie, sniggering at the photos of Nick.

My phone vibrated in my pocket. I flipped it open.

"Hello?"

"_Hey, it's Quil. You know how you guys said that you were going to prank Nick and Jacob tonight? They've just turned up at my place whining about how you guys gave them a fake Wal Mart voucher. They're afraid to go back to Nick's in case they get pranked. They don't know I'm calling. I told them I had to go to the bathroom."  
_

"Well we can't prank them if they're on Quileute land. You need to get them off Quileute land somehow, and bring them back into Forks. Don't make it obvious that you're on our side, though," I said.

"_Yeah, I'll think of something. I'll text you the details."  
_

"Thanks for the tip, Quil."

"_Anytime, Bells."_

I hung up on him and turned to the others, and explained the situation to them.

"They think they're pretty smart, don't they?" laughed Jasper.

"We'll teach those stupid mongrels!" snarled Rosalie. "We'll hit them with a surprise attack. They won't know what hit them!"

**Charlie POV**

Bella being with that Edward bloke was really starting to annoy me. I had barely seen her at all these past few weeks. Maybe Nick was right. Maybe Edward _was _drugging her. She wasn't showing any signs of drug usage, though, so it was probably highly unlikely.

Tonight I had a hot date with Sally-Anne Yorkie, Bella's friend Eric's mother. We were unofficially dating, and I just knew that Bella would be thrilled when she found it. It was really obvious that she loved Sally-Anne, and she would be very pleased.

Sally-Anne and I were sitting in the dining room. The room was candlelit, as a bit of a romantic atmosphere. I had had to order pizza when the turkey I had been _trying_ to cook had burnt to a crisp. I had served an old bottle of wine that I had found in a dark corner of my bedroom.

Sally-Anne looked gorgeous in a green dress and high heels.

"This is nice," she noted, smiling and taking a sip of her wine.

This was it. The moment I had been waiting for. I bent down on one knee and took her hand. I held out a blue leather box.

Her eyes lit up with tears of joy, and she took off her glasses.

"Sally-Anne Yorkie," I began. "We've been dating for months now. Will you marry me?"

I opened the box, revealing a diamond ring. Sally-Anne gasped and nodded.

"Oh, Charlie!" she squealed. "I'd love to!"

The front door burst open and Bella ran in, looking breathless. She was wearing a jumpsuit, and what looked to be war paint was smeared across her feet. She was holding a water pistol, and she stopped dead in her tracks when she saw me kneeling in front of Sally-Anne.

"Um, sorry, dad," muttered Bella. "Didn't realise you were home."

Her eyes strayed to the ring in my hands.

"Bella," I grinned. "Sally-Anne and I are getting married!"

Bella nodded and smiled.

"Yeah, um… that's err… great, dad. I've err… must go. Toodles."

She turned and ran out the door. Sally-Anne's face fell.

"She doesn't approve?"

I laughed.

"Of course she approves! She's just going through some issues with her boyfriend or something," I explained.

**Bella POV**

This was horrible. I had known that Sally-Anne and Charlie were together, but _marriage_?

I ran back down the driveway and jumped onto the backseat of the Volvo.

Edward started up the Volvo, and Emmett, Jasper and Rosalie were still arguing with each other.

"I'm a better team leader than Jasper, so he can't steal my lines!" grumbled Emmett. I growled, to everyone's surprise.

"Shut up, Emmett."

Everyone was silent. Edward turned around in his seat to stare at me open-mouthed.

"Charlie is getting married. To Sally-Anne."

My phone vibrated in my pocket. I pulled it out and held it to my ear.

"Quil?"

"_We're at Nick's place. I told them they were being stupid, and that it was probably just someone's idea of joke to put that fake voucher in their letterbox, and that it had nothing to do with you guys. The idiots fell for it."  
_

"We're on our way."

I hung up on him and told Edward where the mongrels were. Edward drove off into the distance and Jasper burst out laughing.

"Honestly, Jasper! What's gotten into you lately? You're not usually like this. It's not funny. Eric Yorkie's mother is going to be my stepmother! Sheesh, you're getting more like Emmett every day. Do you _want _to be like him?" I snapped, causing Jasper to stop laughing and glare at me.

"One Emmett is enough," muttered Edward. Jasper ignored him.

"I'm nothing like Emmett. In fact, I'm a hell of a lot more intelligent than him, and if I were pranking people, my pranks would outdo his a million times over."

Emmett snorted.

"Think you're smarter than me, Jasper? Well I'm decades older than you, and everyone in this car knows that I could outwit _you_."

"Boys," sighed Rosalie. "We're supposed to be fighting against the mongrels, not against each other. Get over yourselves."

The Volvo came to a halt and Edward turned around in his seat, grinning.

"Come on, let's go."

I opened my door and Jasper pulled me back.

"Stealth is the key," he muttered, earning himself a punch in the back of the head from Emmett.

"_I'm _team leader," he growled, and Jasper rolled his eyes at him.

**Yet another chapter! Thanks to anyone who reviewed. **** It really makes my day to know that people actually read and like this story. Your reviews also help me improve this story, so keep them coming. In the meantime, the next chapter will be here shortly. **

**-Bellapouts**


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